How to use emotional anchors during times of stress

Workplace stress reached an all-time high in 2022, according to a Gallup report. And a 2022 Work and Well-Being Survey from the American Psychological Association found that workers appreciate and seek mental health support in the workplace.

That’s why it’s important for employees to learn and practice techniques that will help them lower their stress during moments when stress levels are high. One way to do this is by creating positive experiences during highly stressful situations, such as recalling times when we were confident, calm, and in control. These serve as emotional anchors that we can trigger at will. In my book, Emotional Intelligence Game Changers: 101 Simple Ways to Win at Work + Life, I share tips on how to increase our confidence.

Here are several techniques for bringing ourselves into that state.

1. Identify the state we want to experience

Take a moment to think of a time when you were in charge of the situation, relaxed and confident with the way things were working out. Remember the feeling that came to you. Think back to that time and try to replay the feelings and sensations in your body when that was happening. Focus on feelings such as confidence, calm, and joy you experienced. Ask yourself, what details can you remember that will bring you back to that place?

2. Find something that will trigger that state, time, and place

Work on finding a physical action that will cause you to automatically think of the situation that brings you into a positive state. This could be a physical gesture, such as tapping yourself on a part of your body. Practice this gesture while bringing yourself into a positive state. And make sure you keep this gesture specific to this purpose, and try to avoid using it for anything else.

3. Check out the anchor in less stressful situations

Instead of waiting to use it in a highly stressful situation, test out the anchor in moments when you aren’t feeling stressful. If it works effectively, then it should be able to work when stress is more prevalent. If the anchor isn’t working as you’d expect or want it to, revisit the anchor technique by intensifying the emotion around the event, and modify your trigger accordingly.

4. Keep practicing and strengthening the anchor

Look for situations throughout the day when you can practice using your anchor. Any situation that increases your stress, even in small levels, is an opportunity to use and solidify the effects of the anchor. You’ll find that if you practice this technique over time, it will become easier to access when you most need it. You’ll no longer need to think of the anchor because it’ll become your natural response in stressful situations.

5. Put your body into it

Another way of strengthening the anchor is to align our physical state with the feelings of confidence. When you straighten your body, put out your chest, and pull back your shoulders, you encourage your body to amplify readiness, strength, and confidence. Add this posture to your anchor.

6. Add an inner mantra

Repeating a mantra over time can also add strength to the anchor. Personalize it to make it more uniquely yours. You’ll want to use words that are powerful, that deeply resonate with you, and that are true of how you felt during the time when you’re experiencing the feelings.

7. Think of situations where the anchor will be helpful

The best way to strengthen the anchor is to anticipate situations where you know it can be useful, then practice using it during these times. Any place, time, or circumstance that brings you out of your comfort zones is a great time to practice. As you begin to experience the benefits of using this in various situations, you’ll find it more and more natural to practice these anchors, and you’ll also embed it in your habits and memories. 

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