Performance Tracking and Feedback

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. 1. Adjusting to not having work friends now that I’m everyone’s manager (#2 at the link) I wrote about six months ago about loneliness at work after being promoted to location manager. On the whole, I’m feeling a great deal more comfortable! Some of my staff were promoted or otherwise moved to different jobs, so the current mix of people has known me mostly as Boss. I’ve been very intentio…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. My job wants me to hit up everyone I know for money and other help So it’s been a bit of a twisty path since I wrote in. I’ll start by thanking Alison and the commentariat for really helpful advice. The small group meetings with the explicit purpose of sharing our personal contacts and their locations kept being postponed. Casual discussions about the principles of the project continued during other meetings, and I began to lay the groundwork suggested in the advice and dis…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer who was the chair of a board and had one board volunteer making everyone’s jobs harder because of his struggles with technology? Here’s the update. I found your advice and the advice in the comments very helpful. To start, I wanted to clear up something that that came up in the comments: this is not a 501(c) organization, though we do volunteer work for them. I fudged some of the details to make my story less recognizable, but this is actually an employer-sponsored affinity group. So no, there is …

Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. An abusive volunteer is holding our website hostage I am no longer a mere VP — I have been elected president! A short summary of my previous letters: I’m on the board of a small organization and we’re all volunteers. There were issues with our webmaster and our website, but the previous president wasn’t wanting to muck around with the site. I understand his reasons but I disagreed with him about it. At our 2024 convention, the (now former) president announced that he was not running for reelection and that I was running for president. The webmaster pulled me aside after this and told me that he was planning to retire, …

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker spends so long in the bathroom that I’m stuck with all the work Can anything realistically be done about a coworker who spends ages in the bathroom? We work in a cafeteria in four-hour shifts where there’s only one hour we serve food. It’s two people on our shift, me and Fergus. He’s in the bathroom for at least 15-20 minutes, sometimes twice a shift. He does sometimes wait until it’s slow, but sometimes he takes so long it goes into when we’re busy. Like yesterday he went at 5:25, and at 5:45 I got fed up and yelled his name. He finally came back. Lunch starts at 6 and we actually start making it at 5:30…

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I saw a question about switching back to the office after working from home, and thought I’d throw the opposite out there. My previous jobs have all been mandatory on-site, with a mix of hands-on procedures and computer-based work. Relatively soon, I’ll be moving to a position that is both 100% desk work and remote (full-time WFH is, for many reasons, not for me, so I’ll be joining a co-working space). This job is a great fit in many ways and I’m excited about it, but I’m looking for ideas of how to make 100% desk work sustainable. I’m a very active person, so I think I’m going to miss all the motion during …

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Is it reasonable to ask teams to “host” coffee hours? My new-ish boss implemented division-wide monthly coffee hours when he started a couple years ago, and it’s been a nice way to get out of your office and talk to others (our division is spread out on a college campus). Due to cost-cutting measures, he is no longer able to spend the small amount of money for these events. Instead, we are asking teams within the division to “host” coffee hours by bringing food in. The administrative assistant is able to help brew coffee, set up, and clean up. This does not seem unreasonable to me, and I signed my team up to host, imag…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Does this new job really involve this much travel? I am considering leaving my in-office job to take a remote job working from home that has a 25% travel requirement. I’m currently interviewing with the company and asked if 25% was accurate or a worst case scenario. The response was one or two international trips a year for two to three weeks! And occasional Monday-Thursday trips throughout the year, possibly as often as monthly. As a mom of two elementary-age kids, being gone for extended periods of time is not something I want to do, nor is it fair for my husband to have to be a single parent for three-week stretche…

A reader writes: My brother (Gen Z/millennial cusp) has been out of work (and stuck living back home with my parents) for a while now, and everyone is understandably frustrated with the situation. A couple times my mom (boomer) and I (millennial) have been one-on-one and she’s brought up the situation, and she’s said that she has told my brother to just “go show up in person to places you’d like to get a job at and try to hand in your resume!” Every single one of my millennial instincts is screaming NO NO NO, this is CLASSIC out-of-touch boomer advice from when we were trying to get jobs during the Great Recession. I told my mom that yeah, that doesn’t really work now …

Here are three recent success stories submitted by readers. 1. A successful raise request I wanted to share that I used your advice for asking for a raise to successfully increase my salary. I presented salary surveys from nonprofit industry groups and local job postings for similar positions that showed my old salary was low compared to current listings in my metro area. In the end, I received a 9% raise, which I feel pretty good about. It isn’t as much as I hoped, but my supervisor did acknowledge it was the most they could give me at this time and that at first the proposed raise from HR was 6%. 2. A successful salary negotiation This is not me but my Gen Z daughte…

A reader writes: I work in an industry notorious for poor work-life balance. Our company has an unlimited PTO policy, with most people on the team taking about 15-20 days, usually no more than five straight days at a time. (So one week off per quarter, just about) I have a team member who has asked for feedback. She wants to grow and be assigned more high-profile, visible projects. The quality of her work is average to slightly above average, so there’s room for growth there. On top of this, the main thing I believe is preventing her from achieving these goals is that people perceive her to be on vacation all the time. I’d say she’ll end up taking around 30 days (six w…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. A coworker lent me a book four years ago and I still haven’t returned it This feels very low-stakes, but it’s something that hovers at the back of my mind. About four years ago, a coworker and I were talking about books we were reading, and she gushed about a great one she’d just finished. The next day, she brought a copy of the book to the office and gave it to me, suggesting I should read it. Since then, I’ve moved twice, I still have the book, and I still haven’t read it. I am avoiding returning it because I’m embarrassed that I haven’t read it (I’m a big reader, but I very much read by mood, and this book is outsi…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Can I ask my company to paint over part of an office mural? I work at a large American law firm in a medium sized branch office (HR is based in another state). My office has this huge … corporate mural? Collage? It’s a collection of portraits of famous and “inspirational” people and “inspiring” quotes. It’s got world leaders, people from history books, athletes, authors, movie stars, etc. Each individual portrait is maybe one foot by one foot? This thing spans multiple walls, floor to ceiling, probably a couple of hundred portraits total. This piece of “art” ends at the entrance to the office supply room, and the main…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My husband says it’s inappropriate to dine or carpool with my boss I have a great relationship with my boss. He is incredibly supportive of my professional growth and is a good mentor. We work well together on projects and complement each other’s skills. We’ve built a great team and are very intentional about culture. Relationships are incredibly important in our field. Some context: He is a man, I am a woman, and he’s about 10 years older than me. My husband hates my boss, and he’s not shy about it. He says my boss doesn’t look him in the eye or shake his hand when they run into each other at work functions. He alway…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Employee keeps falling asleep in meetings I have an employee who joined the team about 10 months ago. He is a good contributor so far, but I’ve noticed he has a bad habit of drowsing off during afternoon meetings, especially ones that are within an hour after lunch. I brought it up to him once about 2-3 months after he joined the team, and told him frankly that it was unprofessional and not acceptable. He agreed and said that he would work on getting better. But in the past month I’ve noticed it happening again. He’s also a bit older (maybe early 60’s though I don’t know his exact age) — not that age changes anything, …

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. I’m being asked to lead DEI training with no expertise in it I’m very happy to work for a company that remains committed to DEI, even in this strange time. The direction coming down from many levels above me is that the company will be implementing DEI training for all employees. And because my colleague and I have experience conducting training, the powers-that-be have decided that we will present the DEI training, even though we have no expertise in DEI. We’ve had a chance to preview the course they want to use, and it is A LOT. Maybe this is a model DEI course? I wouldn’t know, since this is not my field! On top of…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker is dating a teenager I work in retail and have younger coworkers rotate through on a regular basis. Think late teens to early twenties. I am significantly older than them and often offer general life advice or encouragement. One of my coworkers (22) can be a bit sporadic. He’s a hard worker and fairly cheerful person but on rare occasions he makes really stupid decisions without thinking of the consequences. Previous problems include gambling more than he should have, not showing up for work, and slashing his roommate’s tires after an argument. I’m aware that this makes him sound like a nightmare but it is…

It’s more holiday stories! Tradition dictates that as we head into the holiday season, we must revisit holiday stories previously shared by readers. Here are some favorites. 1. The rare books department I’ve changed up a couple of details from this being super recognizable, but I used to work in a rare books department in a library. People who work in rare books tend to have pretty esoteric passions that lead them there, and these were always on full display at said party. My favorite selections from over the years: – The brand new head of the department wanted to show off a bit at his first Christmas party, give a speech… and sing “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” with his 2…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer whose boss wanted her to verify that she was really exercising? Here’s the update. I appreciated the validation offered by you and your readers, and apologize I couldn’t be available when it was posted for replies. The executive director’s deadline for my “proof” was just a couple days after I reached out to you, so I had to take action before you had a chance to publish your reply. I thought about replying to the email from my executive director with the verification documents and including my ma…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. 1. My boss thinks my employee is lying about having cancer Yes, this is an update to “My boss thinks my employee is lying about having cancer.” Yes, she was. She also lied about losing her parents. She is also now lying on LinkedIn about the dates she was working for us, with her end date a few months earlier than her resignation. It turns out the absences and poor performance were bec…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. 1. My office is infested with wasps Here’s an update to the wasp infestation in my office: it is still ongoing. The wasps are still there. I forcefully invoked my rights under the law and was finally allowed to work from home until the wasps are gone, but I am under the impression that nothing particularly has been done about the infestation. I fully expect the wasps to return next year u…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. My coworker’s constant babbling is drowning me in info, and my boss won’t help So as it happened, by the time the post went up I’d left the job and the region. But not long after I sent in the letter, I sat down and laid this out to my boss pretty much exactly as I wrote in. He wasn’t blind so while he wasn’t exactly thrilled, he did get it. I was a receptionist/admin in a small public office with regular customer service and sales tasks in addition to EA and admin work, my…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer asked whether they’d been wrong not to interview a problematic volunteer for a paid job? Here’s the update. You and the commenters were extremely helpful. I was reassured that the decision itself was not inappropriate, but better communication would have helped a lot along the way (isn’t that always the case?). One of the first things I did was go back and re-read the personalized rejection I had sent Stephan…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer who asked how to adjust to returning to the office after working from home for five years? Here’s the update. It’s now been almost five months since the 50% in-office mandate began, and it has been … an adjustment, but not nearly as difficult as I anticipated. I ended up choosing to spend one work week of the pay period in the office, and the other work week at home. (For context, the work week for our state government agencies is Wednesday through Tuesday, so that means I go in on Wednesday, Thurs…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer whose boss (Ned) and she shared an office with a volatile jerk (Peter)? Here’s the update. After my letter was published, I spoke to Ned and told him I would not be assisting Peter further, which he fully supported. I started referring Peter to his adult children for assistance, which left him huffy but he stopped bothering me. He also began spending more and more time away from the office and out of state, “working” on their joint venture. As for Peter and Ned, their business relationship has end…