Performance Tracking and Feedback

A reader writes: I’m writing for some advice on how to help my mentee set expectations at work. I work at a small educational site. Alice came to us through an independent living program for young adults with disabilities, and she was absolutely fantastic as a volunteer. She was extremely passionate about the work and already had independently picked up a bunch of extremely niche skills (for anonymity let’s say it’s reconstructing historical rice sculptures) that would normally take years of training, so most of the guidance I was giving her was more in relation to her soft skills and building confidence in her own abilities. She also has A Lot going on in her personal …

A reader writes: I’m doing an internship at a nonprofit. My current boss is getting a promotion and changing jobs. She was a great boss and I want to thank her and keep the mentorship going, but I’m not sure how to do so without being awkward. Any ideas? Tell her! Let her know that you’ve really appreciated working for her and why — be specific here about what she’s taught you, if you can — and say that you’d love to stay in touch and potentially even meet up for coffee occasionally. You could say, “I respect your judgment so much that I’d love to be able to come to you as a sounding board in the future, if that’s something you’re open to.” From there, make a point of…

A reader writes: I manage some junior team members who are right out of college. One thing I have noticed is that they have a hard time saying no when I ask request something from them — as in, “Can this be done today?” or “Do you think this is a good idea?” I’ve made a career of being able to tell clients hard news, I really don’t mind hearing no! I don’t want them to overwork themselves because of what they perceive I need done, or do work that will send us over-budget. Sometimes I need to be able to have a quick conversation about these things and just get a clear “no” from them if that’s the realistic answer. Prefacing everything with “it’s really okay if you can’t…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I am the director of a small, public-facing unit. We have a full-time staff of 10 and several part-time workers. I am struggling with our leave system and how to make it as equitable as possible. Current policy (that I inherited) is that employees can put in all leave for the following year beginning in November of the previous year, and first-come first-serve wins. We have some employees who quickly take a lot of the prime spots, particularly around spring break and holidays. Not everyone can plan ahead like this, however, and so some of our people then get little to no time around …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Can I refuse to pray with my religious client? I am a militantly non-religious person and have worked with a religion-based nonprofit as a consultant for a couple of years now. I am somewhat new to the workforce, and this is my first consulting gig. They have always asked me to pray with them and for them at the beginning and end of every meeting. Because I really needed the work, I went along with this, and they have the idea that I support what they do and follow their beliefs. However, as time passes, it is becoming harder and harder for me to p…

A reader writes: I work in a 15-person team within a larger organization. We have a hybrid work scheme, with mandatory in-office Mondays and at least one other day on-site per week. We’re a fairly close team, and we all get along despite differences in age, life experience, etc. One of my colleagues, Emma, is a bit of a health nut. Every few months, she tries out a different diet or fad to try and make herself “skinny.” I think she’s already a healthy weight, but she’s very focused on it and on top of that she’s health-conscious and seems to enjoy reading about diet and nutrition. Emma never parades her new diets around or tries to shame anyone about what they’re eatin…

A reader writes: My coworker, Chuckie, has concerns. A lot of concerns. They aren’t necessarily unfounded — I would say about 50% are completely justified, 40% have some foundation but are overblown, either mildly or significantly, and 10% are ridiculous — but he tends to bring them up with the attitude of a beleaguered martyr airing grievances rather than a professional colleague addressing work issues. He often talks at length about his own stress and frustration and implies (or even outright states) that no one outside of our department cares about the work we do or the people we serve. My main problem is that sometimes Chuckie raises issues in a way that implies he …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I just got feedback from my manager that I need to work on communication with a coworker. I think it’s mainly about tone not content, and I agree with the feedback — I have admittedly been pretty short. I’m irritated and it’s coming across. Where I’m getting stuck, though, is that it’s coming from a place of frustration and I’m not sure how to solve it without doing something about the underlying frustration. Let me give more context. My coworker Petunia and I are a two-person team. For the sake of anonymity, let’s say we do llama support; she is more junior and provides, say, llama …

A reader writes: I recently received an email from an employee wanting to discuss her future with the company and opportunities for advancement. I responded that we will be reorganizing the team soon (which is true) and relying heavily on her input on what responsibilities she wants to take on (also true). My issue is that it’s unlikely there will be any opportunities for advancement on our team. The organization is very hierarchical and positions are determined at an organization-wide level with little flexibility for job duties or pay increases. Her current position is at the bottom of the org chart and any opportunities to advance would probably be in a different geo…

A reader writes: Hopefully this is a non-issue very soon, but I was wondering what ideas you’ve encountered or heard of that might be helpful. I am a manager of a small to medium-sized federal office. We are in furlough but required to work. While most of my employees are okay financially at the moment, we have three or four (and probably one or two who are private) who are being hit hard, and with SNAP benefits seemingly going away this is going to be a real issue for them and their families. We have certain ethical boundaries we can’t cross, and I don’t want to single any one out. But I can’t let my employees go hungry. Have you heard of any creative ideas that I mig…

A reader writes: People in my office frequently come into work very obviously sick and many times get other people sick. Most people do not have the ability to work from home with the work we do. We’ve sent a firm-wide message telling people that we prefer that sick employees stay home, as to stop the spread to the rest of the staff. Unfortunately, this didn’t make much of a difference. I understand that people want to save their paid time off for more enjoyable times, but it’s not fair to the coworkers to whom they spread their germs. (We also offer six paid sick days, separate from vacation and personal leave.) What else can we do? I answer this question over at Inc.…

A reader writes: My company is technically hybrid, but my department is almost exclusively work from home, which has suited me. This week, we’d been asked whether or not we’ll be attending an all-hands in person or on Zoom and I’d been really struggling with the decision. I like my coworkers, but I invariably get sick when I do in-person stuff and spent half of September audibly sick from the last in-person department meeting I attended. If I went, I planned to mask. The meeting was listed as being from 9 am – 1 pm and lunch is provided, but masking only works if you stay masked. That means I can’t eat or drink unless I’m outside and there’s no outdoor space at this loc…

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I saw a question about switching back to the office after working from home, and thought I’d throw the opposite out there. My previous jobs have all been mandatory on-site, with a mix of hands-on procedures and computer-based work. Relatively soon, I’ll be moving to a position that is both 100% desk work and remote (full-time WFH is, for many reasons, not for me, so I’ll be joining a co-working space). This job is a great fit in many ways and I’m excited about it, but I’m looking for ideas of how to make 100% desk work sustainable. I’m a very active person, so I think I’m going to miss all the motion during …

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I’m writing in to find out how to get prepared, both literally and mentally, for a relatively quick change in my work situation. Context: I work at a state agency in Minnesota and for the last five years a large majority of state employees have been teleworking, with occasional in-person attendance for division meetings, conferences, trainings, etc. There are state employees who have been working onsite the whole time, so I understand that I am very fortunate to have been able to work from home. However, on Tuesday a notice was released announcing that state employees are being ordered back to the office at…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have many questions about applying to internal jobs, something I have never done. At my current company, a new role came up that is a dream job for me. But it is also a reach, as it would be a bit of a career change. Knowing this job might open up, I’ve been making efforts to get to know the hiring manager, and I think we have a good relationship. But how do I actually navigate applying? I know it’s best practice not to tell your manager when you are job hunting, but what about when the job you’re applying for is an internal one? My manager is fair and a nice person, but I still do…

A reader writes: I’m student work head at a university library — basically, I’m a student managing the regular student workers as a way of getting experience in management, leadership, etc. One of the workers has a bad habit of asking questions about everything. Usually it isn’t too bad, and of course curiosity should usually be encouraged, though it can derail conversations. But recently, there was an incident where some of our just-put-up Christmas decorations were stolen. Naturally, I was upset, and I happened to mutter, “Whoever did this is a real berk.” (I don’t know why I chose that word — it was just the first that leapt to mind.) Overhearing this, she asked, “Wh…

A reader writes: I’ve been working in the marketing department of a large company for nine years, in a somewhat specialized role. I sit within a smaller subteam originally managed by “Jean-Luc,” who was the kind of manager everyone hopes for — fiercely protective of his team, willing to go to bat for any of us, and fair if it came down to any issues that needed dealing with. At the beginning of the year, Jean-Luc told us that he’d be moving on and assured us he’d be directly responsible for hiring his replacement to ensure a good fit. Two weeks before he left (I’m in the UK and we typically have three-month notice periods), he hired “Kai Wynn,” who seemed very knowledge…

A reader writes: About a year ago, I got prescribed a CPAP machine. Very important for, you know, supplying oxygen to my brain while I sleep, but one doozy of an adjustment period. It took me about a month to adjust to wearing it at night, and during that month I lowkey felt like I was dying. I was getting very little sleep, and that in small bursts. I was exhausted all the time, and exhaustion made me stupid and slow. I work in a compliance-related role. My job involves assessing regulatory liability for my employer and potential misconduct by licensed employees. If I find against an employee, it’s the kind of thing that could follow them for the rest of their career, …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Lately I’ve been subject to a technique by coworkers that I call “death by a thousand questions.” It goes something like this: Q: Hey, are we getting in the combination llama/alpaca wool? A: I don’t have a date yet, I’m hoping for the 20th. Q: So the 20th. A: It’s not confirmed. I’ll let you know as soon as I know. Q: Who needs to confirm it? A: The freight forwarder. Q: Well, haven’t they confirmed it before? A: Yes, and when they confirm it they will let me know. Q: Why can’t they confirm it now? A: I’m not sure, but they are a reliable company. Q: Is it their provider? …

A reader writes: I would love some feedback/advice for how to deal with a difficult colleague in a different department. We work with this department to handle legal mattes for our group, so we have to liaise with him occasionally. He is a terrible communicator. Every time we meet, he goes on long, irrelevant tangents that are the same or similar each time. We usually have a lot to cover in these meetings, and I hate wasting time when things need to get done. At our most recent meeting, he had rescheduled a number of times and then at the last minute decided to call in rather than show up in person (so I was already annoyed). After being asked direct, straightforward q…

A reader writes: I have recently made it to the second round of interviews for a role I’m very interested in. The conversation is with the person who is leaving the role I’m interviewing for. I’ve never interviewed with the person who is currently in the job in question, but I take that to mean that she’s leaving the organization on good terms and for her own reasons, and that they trust her to make a recommendation on who will succeed her. Would you agree with that take on the situation, and if so what kinds of questions do you think I should ask or expect? How do I sell myself for the role without coming across as “I’m going to be better at this than you were,” which …

A reader writes: I’m looking for advice on how to pursue a new job discreetly, particularly when the interview process requires multiple rounds and my current workplace has very little flexibility. I’ve been with my current employer for 10 years. I started here before I even graduated from college, and I’ve grown tremendously. It’s a well-regarded organization with a prestigious name, and I genuinely believe they care about their people. That said, it’s time for me to leave. I’m no longer challenged, the work doesn’t excite me, and at my site things are fairly old school: no work from home, less vacation than many other employers, no flex hours, and we pay for our own …

A reader writes: I could use some advice about some employees, two of whom report to me and one who doesn’t. Bob reports to me. He assigns cases to both Sue and Sally. Sue reports to me and Sally doesn’t. Sue and Sally don’t like Bob. They don’t like his brusque (but still professional) style, they don’t like that he’s not “nice” like his predecessor, and they don’t like it when he seems inconsistent. Bob doesn’t like his decisions questioned. He comes from a legal background and really can be pretty officious. Again, it’s not unprofessional, but it’s certainly not friendly or warm. He could go a long way in being collegial. When I direct Bob to be patient with Sue an…

A reader writes: I manage someone with extreme social anxiety who seems a lot like person #1 in this column. Lee is very good at their job-specific tasks, which are largely operational and do not require much social interaction with the team or outsiders. We have established some office protocols that help support them (allowing camera-off in Zoom meetings, using Teams chat as a communication tool, etc.) However, we are a very small team and do have times when we need all hands on deck — for example, for an event for all of our clients, when I need Lee to do something like staff the registration table so other staff are free to lead parts of the event that are more rel…

A reader writes: I manage an employee who has admitted that she struggles with ADHD, and unfortunately it’s affecting her work. I could use some advice on how to proceed. She regularly forgets to clock in and clock out when she works, sometimes missing more than half her clock punches in a pay period. This leaves us struggling to finalize her timecard when it’s due, often having to call her at home on her day off to find out her hours. I’m concerned that her memory of the hours worked a week prior might not be accurate either, so who knows if we’re paying appropriately for the time she actually spent at work. She often ignores high-priority work that needs to be finish…