Performance Tracking and Feedback

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: About a year and a half ago, I was forced to lay off multiple employees. I was truly heartbroken to see most of them go. But there were two employees I swore I’d never hire back. They both did fairly decent work, but were bullies who fed off of one another’s bad behavior. They were constantly in my office explaining why they’d said something nasty to one of their coworkers or why they’d ransacked another’s belongings. They were also blatantly disrespectful to me. One was far worse than the other, though. Now that we’re hiring again, employees have contacted me and asked for their job…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I keep finding myself in this weird situation at work. I’m a medical resident in an academic hospital system in a big progressive city. I keep finding myself in mandatory educational events where the facilitator introduces the concept of privilege as if no one’s ever heard of it and invites/demands everyone to share their privilege/lack thereof. Real examples: “Let’s all reflect on our positionality, and then go around the room. I’m Dr. LastName. As you know, I’m the head of this department. I’m the child of South Asian immigrants, and I’m able-bodied. I live with my wife and childre…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I recently interviewed for and accepted a job as a nurse at the very small hospital in my very small midwestern town. My lovely manager was very transparent about how they are big supporters of work-life balance, and gave tangible examples of how they support families, because they have “small town values.” She is clearly very proud of this fact and puts a lot of stock in being a “good” manager. I know some of the employees on that floor, and everything she says seems to be true and not just lip service. Well, I am pregnant (around 15-16 weeks when I interviewed) but, naturally, did …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I recently interviewed for a new job that I was really excited: it’s exactly what I want to be doing next in my career, at a company I’ve heard good things about, and with a salary range that would be a significant boost from what I earn currently. After the second interview, the hiring manager asked me for my references. I sent her contact info for my manager from the two previous jobs before my current one, as well as a senior colleague who I’ve worked closely with. I didn’t offer my current manager since she does not know that I’m looking, and I would rather she not know until I’m…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Our marketing team refuses to do projects for us, then complains if we do them ourselves I’m one of several who create new educational resources for our target audience. Like most companies, we have a graphic design/marketing department that designs and approves anything that’s going to be seen by the public. Well, they’re supposed to. Most of my work is in response to current events, so I might make a new guide for our customers who want to learn more about XYZ. I’ll do the research and most of the formatting, and I’m supposed to send it off to th…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have a question about something that happened early in my career. Obviously there’s nothing I can do to change the past, but I’m curious about whether I had options I didn’t know about due to my inexperience. Immediately out of college, I was hired to work for a religious nonprofit organization. I started by working in their after-school program and eventually moved in to a supervisor position. My manager, “Simon,” and I got along really well for a couple of years (we were close in age and I’d say I considered him a friend), but in my third year at the organization, his attitude to…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Recently, my boss sent me five spreadsheets, several with multiple tabs, to fill out but offered no information on what went in which row, column, or tab. I managed to figure most of it out (she gets annoyed when I ask her questions) and asked for clarification on the rest. I only had hours to get all of this done because it was due the next day and she had sent it to me a few hours into my workday so I had to work quickly. I apparently filled out one of the columns wrong, subtracting the scores instead of adding them. I went to her office to address it, and she was infuriated. She pr…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have a new employee (Joe) who joined us three months ago in a manager role that needs to collaborate with and support other team’s workflows. His 90-day review is scheduled to be held in a couple of weeks. I have received feedback from my manager that Joe has been stepping on a couple of our colleagues’ toes and is being a little too aggressive, veering into unprofessional territory with them. The two people reporting concerns are on a team that Joe needs to work very closely with and have a good relationship with to be successful in his role. One is a peer to him and another is a …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I work in a department of nine people. We all get along well, but I’m struggling with how to handle my frustrations with my colleague, Marrgo. Margo is possibly the most well-intentioned person I’ve ever met, but she has the infuriating habit of bringing every conversation back to herself to explain how she understands or has been through the same thing. This week, the transmission in my car died. When I was lamenting to the group that I was now facing the financial hardship of either repairing it or buying a new car, Margo told me, “I get it. I just had to buy brand new tires for my…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss is my boyfriend and won’t give me a day off The owner of the restaurant where I work is my boyfriend and the general manager. I asked for a day off a month ahead of when I needed it off. It’s on Mother’s Day and, yes, it is one of the busiest days of the year. But I have worked there for three years and never took a day off, unless he wanted us to go on a vacation. He recently hired someone two weeks ago and promised her Mother’s Day off because it’s her birthday. I have missed out on so so many things in the past three years because he need…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. Today we have two letters, one question. The first: I’m a fed in a (relatively) safe job in a (relatively) safe agency, and while I’m hoping to stay, I am keeping an eye out for other opportunities. But as someone who went straight from academia to the federal government, I realized I don’t know where to look beyond places like LinkedIn or Indeed. I’m sure many job categories have their own niche places to look for job announcements, but how do you find out about them? Maybe people who are looking could say their desired job category in the comments and ot…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A salary negotiation success story from a reader: Due to a lack of backfills, I’ve absorbed the work of some attritions over the last couple of years and have been operating for some time as three raccoons in a trench coat. I’ve far exceeded expectations and have been recognized in performance reviews (although not raises — my company has been well below cost of living for some time, with my department averaging around 2% annually since 2020). Now the very rare event for my company has happened where they’ve decided to permanently promote the job level of my existing role — to take what I’ve made it i…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Is there a professionally acceptable way to push back when someone apologizes for causing problems at work? For example, this morning, my colleague slept through a meeting we had scheduled. Since I’m on the west coast (we’re a remote team), this meeting required me to wake up at 5 am. She messaged me two hours later saying, “Whoops, I totally spaced on this meeting. Sorry!” My normal response would be to say something like, “It’s okay! When can we reschedule?” But … it’s not okay! Not just because I woke up early, but because I was unprepared for my next meeting as a result. This ha…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. If I opt out of team-building activities, I still have to work on those days I work for a small nonprofit with about 25 employees. Recently, we have begun “employee engagement” activities, like visiting local attractions. These activities take place during work hours. We are not forced to participate, but if we choose not to, then we are expected to work while those who do want to participate are basically paid to hang out at a local attraction, restaurant, etc. I don’t enjoy these kinds of group activities, but I’m not trying to keep anyone from g…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I’m an admin in a small office, with a centrally located desk. One of my coworkers, Miranda, literally never stops talking. I counted for a while and she averages two major interruptions per hour, mostly extended monologues about personal minutiae, intimate relationship problems, or absolute and total nonsense. Basically, her entire internal monologue is externalized at all times. She announces everything she’s doing. She tells me long stories about how she managed things like “loaning her bike to someone” or “changing the exact location of her keys” that follow the entire storyline …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. View the full article

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Eloise is 20 years old (!) and was living in a shelter cage, but now she has a house of her own. This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: I See You’ve Called In Dead, by John Kenney. An obituary writer publishes his own obituary after drinking too much one night, then he learns his newspaper can’t fire him because their systems now list him as dead. (Amazon, Bookshop) * I earn a commission if you use those links. View the full article

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I would really love your opinion on how we handled this hiring process — and on the subsequent fallout. I work for a public library that has a very large volunteer base and a small paid staff. When we have a job opening, which is rare, volunteers are welcome to apply. We traditionally grant them a phone interview (i.e., they make the first cut) as a courtesy, though that is not official policy. A few volunteers have been hired over the years, most recently about three years ago. One volunteer, Stephanie, has applied twice (two years apart) and made it to an in-person interview (seco…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I am one of the lucky few who have not been greatly affected by layoffs in my region. While I am working from home, I am still working. I work in an industry that is fairly well insulated, considering the circumstances. I have a friend who has been laid off from their job in a very different field. This friend emailed me the other day asking me if I had any leads on jobs that they could apply to. The only person I know in a field anywhere close to theirs is in the same position, laying off workers. I have no idea what to say to this person in response. Can you help? I answer this qu…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. View the full article

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Through a bit of misfortune, I had to fall back on working at the company my parents own, in order to pay my bills. It is a challenging job market, to say the least, so I am grateful that I have this safety net I can fall back on. However, it isn’t without its own league of challenges: my coworkers have taken to making complaints about me to my parents, who are the bosses, about issues that quite frankly seem petulant. In one case, one coworker was noting what times I was clocking in and made a complaint when I clocked in three hours earlier than everybody else to finish paperwork in…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader shares this story: I recently received what I believe to be a scam job offer. It seemed too good to be true, and I should have realized it was a scam, especially since I don’t remember applying for the position at the company that supposedly offered it to me. The most obvious red flag was that it seemed too good to be true, and the text in the email was clearly copied and pasted from a template. Still, in the excitement of the moment, I almost fell for it. Here’s how it went down: First email: A seemingly legitimate email from someone within the organization asked me to reply “yes” if I was…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Remember the letter-writer who manages a terrible slob and asked how to convince her upset coworker that it’s being handled? Here’s the update. I actually have an update to this situation right now! I appreciated so much of the advice in the comments, as well as yours. I didn’t get much into everything I had done with Sally since my question was really about Susie, but it really did sound like I was blowing off Susie without that additional context! Susie and Sally have separate offices with doors on a large campus. Most of Susie’s work happens on her computer, except for an occasional client meeting…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have a manager who you would deem unfixable, and I’m currently job hunting so I can put him behind me. In the meantime, I’d love your advice on how to handle this very emotionally draining situation. It has been two years of trying to fix him and I’ve exhausted every avenue, including seeking help from his manager. He’s not changing and I know that; he is very much out of his depth in the role, has poor professional instincts, and is emotionally juvenile. Last year, he blew up at me after I tried to reopen a conversation about my concerns regarding his shortcomings (obviously not …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss leads the worst staff meetings ever Every month my boss leads an all-staff meeting, and it is awful. Normally he is a pretty good boss, and I enjoy working with him. But this meeting is regularly 1.5-2 hours long and largely irrelevant to half the staff because it is mostly geared towards one team (out of 4). My boss also tries to make these meetings “fun” by asking people for personal pictures — at one meeting he showed pictures for 45 minutes before even getting to the business/informational part, during the height of our busy season. I ma…