Performance Tracking and Feedback

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. The etiquette of “participation noises” in meetings I was very recently diagnosed as neurodivergent, and exploring my actions through that lens has thrown up some questions for me about whether I am missing a few cues. I work for a grant-making foundation as the grants and funding manager,, and my role partially involves traveling around our state visiting our grant applicants and grantee partners. My state is very rural and very low in the national education rankings, and most of these meetings aren’t exactly adhering to corporate norms. One of the things that often happens is what I could term “audience participation…

Earlier this month, we talked about times when coworkers have really overshared at work, and here are 10 of the most ridiculous stories you shared. 1. The wireless mike At a local stage production, while the audience sat quietly in the darkened theater awaiting the start of the show, a graphic description of the previous night’s one-night stand, including groans of subsequent aches and chafing, clearly came out over the leading lady’s wireless microphone clipped to her costume as she relieved herself on the toilet. 2. The skit I used to be a teacher at a prison — very odd population of people, a mix of mercenaries, martyrs, and misfits. For a statewide conference, the…

A reader writes: Although I have managed project teams for many years, I have only started supervising staff directly in the last few years and am about to begin managing my first fully remote employee. Any advice on managing a fully remote employee? I’m fine with task management for project teams in different locations, but being someone’s supervisor also includes supporting their professional growth, making sure we as the employer are meeting their needs, addressing problems that may arise, and assigning work to meet chargeability goals. I also want to make sure that this employee stays happy, especially as she grows professionally. And my reports and I are known as a…

A reader writes: I’m writing in about a situation a friend is in. He was at the annual convention for his employer organization when he was called into a meeting with his boss and his boss’s boss. They informed him that he was under investigation and they couldn’t tell him anything more, but that he was to leave the convention immediately as they’d canceled his hotel room. (I should note that the convention was an hour’s drive from his home, so it’s not like he had to reschedule flights or anything.) The day after the convention, they sent him an email informing him that he was terminated. The reason for his termination? They had discovered he had applied for another jo…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss says three female employees having dinner together would be discrimination I recently organized a dinner with two of my closest colleagues/friends. It was planned outside of work hours and paid for personally. The dinner grew to include the three other women employees. When my supervisor found out, he said it was gender discrimination because none of the 15 male employees were invited. Without naming names, he made a public announcement about it at our next department meeting. Is it gender discrimination if women coworkers want to have dinner together in their own social time? Aren’t women a protected legal cl…

A reader writes: I have the oddest situation. I have given my notice at a healthcare nonprofit (let’s call it the Wellness Alliance). I’ve been a part of Wellness since the very early days. One of the people I mentored, Katy, went into leadership, became the lead social worker, and turned people against me when our last CEO left. I recently gave notice because Katy got the leadership team to bully a young staff member out of Wellness after they asked for my help on a case, even though Katy had ignored their request, and that was the final straw for me. Katy had a sessional gig at our local college, and I recently met one of her students, Fergus. Fergus was looking for a…

A reader writes: I’m a newish manager, and I have one direct report. My new employee, “Susan,” quit this week. Her old employer had reached out to her and made her a dream offer. I spent five months training Susan. She had learned a lot and was starting to work well independently. The thought of starting over training a new employee is exhausting and depressing, and I feel completely defeated. Susan isn’t the whole story. Before Susan, my employee was Joe. Joe worked for me for three months before his serious mental health issues became apparent. His anxiety and depression made it impossible for him to come to work on many days, and he told me that the job was too stres…

Some letters from Minneapolis: For the past several weeks, the Twin Cities, and the state of Minnesota overall, has been under siege by federal agents. My friends and coworkers are scared to leave their homes. Every day we see and hear about another innocent person being harassed, detained, and spirited away by plane and kept from their family, friends, pets, and lawyers. Neighbors exercising their constitutional rights are gassed and beaten. Victims emerge from detention centers with horrifying accounts. My friend was on the scene when Renee Good was murdered. In some of the coldest weather of my life, we stood outside for hours screaming for ICE to leave. People are no…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Does this new job really involve this much travel? I am considering leaving my in-office job to take a remote job working from home that has a 25% travel requirement. I’m currently interviewing with the company and asked if 25% was accurate or a worst case scenario. The response was one or two international trips a year for two to three weeks! And occasional Monday-Thursday trips throughout the year, possibly as often as monthly. As a mom of two elementary-age kids, being gone for extended periods of time is not something I want to do, nor is it fair for my husband to have to be a single parent for three-week stretche…

A reader writes: I’m a 20-year-old woman working at a locally owned company. I joined when I was 19 and currently hold the role of marketing director. I am the youngest person in the office by a wide margin; most of my coworkers are in their 60s or older and have been with the company for several years. I take my work seriously. I have a relevant degree, prior experience (I graduated college early at 18 and started working in marketing jobs while still studying) and a strong work ethic. In the day-to-day office environment, I’m quieter and focused, but still friendly, professional, and social when appropriate. I don’t engage in office gossip, especially when it involves…

Although we’ve been told that AI is poised to “revolutionize” work, at the moment it seems to be doing something else entirely: spreading chaos. At Slate today, I wrote about how, throughout American offices, AI platforms like ChatGPT are delivering answers that sound right even when they aren’t, transcription tools that turn meetings into works of fiction, and documents that look polished on the surface but are riddled with factual errors and missing nuance. You can read it here. The post AI is creating chaos at work appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

A reader writes: I hold a leadership role and report to the co-founders of a small company, which has both an office hub and a remote workforce. The co-founders work in the office, and my team and I work remotely. Lately, a fitness tracking device that also monitors sleep and stress levels became popular in the office. It seems like nearly everyone in the office got one, and they started a global group that compares performance and it became a friendly competition. My boss, one of the co-founders, asked me to buy one so I can be part of the competition. When I refused to pay $240 for something I didn’t intend on buying, they offered to pay for it. I feel pressured to s…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Is it reasonable to ask teams to “host” coffee hours? My new-ish boss implemented division-wide monthly coffee hours when he started a couple years ago, and it’s been a nice way to get out of your office and talk to others (our division is spread out on a college campus). Due to cost-cutting measures, he is no longer able to spend the small amount of money for these events. Instead, we are asking teams within the division to “host” coffee hours by bringing food in. The administrative assistant is able to help brew coffee, set up, and clean up. This does not seem unreasonable to me, and I signed my team up to host, imag…

I don’t know what to say about what’s happening that won’t sound performative, but business as usual doesn’t feel okay right now. It’s not okay. I’m honestly not sure how to meet this moment with a blog about work. But I’m here, and I’m horrified. If you are, too, here are some ways you can help. Contact your elected representatives. Here’s one script. Here’s another. Here’s a letter you can send. A hub of organizations, fundraisers, mutual aid needs, and more: Stand With Minnesota American Civil Liberties Union ACLU of Minnesota Community rapid response and ICE observation trainings: Unidos MN The post some ways to help right now appeared first on Ask a Manager. …

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: The Scandalous Confessions of Lydia Bennet, Witch, by Melinda Taub. In this amusing retelling of Pride and Prejudice, Lydia is a witch, Kitty is a cat (although thanks to a spell, everyone but Lydia believes she’s another Bennet sister), and Mr. Wickham is a literal demon. (Amazon, Bookshop) Please enjoy this painting of Laurie by extremely talented reader Istra, inspired by this ridiculous photo! Here are more. * I earn a commission if you use those links. The post weeken…

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. The post open thread – January 23, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. I left work because no one would let me in I (19-year-old female) recently ghosted my job at McDonalds because my coworkers would lock me out at 5 in the morning. Why? I’m not completely sure, I’m guessing it was to keep the customers out but again, I’m not completely sure. All I know is that Every. Single. Time. they scheduled me to work at 5am, I would always be locked out the building and it would always take me roughly 10-25 minutes to get in the building without breaking the door down, blowing up the phone, or climbing through the drive-through window. Going to the drive-through didn’t help either because nobody i…

A reader writes: The CTO of our company is our CEO’s high school buddy. If you come to him with a problem, he always wants to jump on a call with you to hear the problem and troubleshoot. However, 95% of the time, I don’t need to be on this call. I don’t have any amplifying information other than reporting that something isn’t working. He wants to think out loud and chat. It’s a huge waste of time. Lately, I’ve been flat out refusing to be on a call with him by saying, “I don’t have any additional information, so a call is not needed.” Instead I will Slack him with the problem and my attempts at resolution (again, all of the information I have). I’m realizing that he do…

Here’s a round-up of advice about counteroffers. can I leverage a job offer for a raise at my current job? should I use a job offer to get a raise at my current job? should I talk with my manager before I accept another job, even though I wouldn’t accept a counteroffer? my job made me a shocking counteroffer can I ask an employer to match a counteroffer from my current job? when a recruiter wants you to commit to not accepting a counteroffer some cautionary tales my company made a counteroffer to keep me — and now is attaching strings to it my employer made me a counteroffer, then rescinded it I accepted my company’s counteroffer, and now they’re going back on o…

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I saw a question about switching back to the office after working from home, and thought I’d throw the opposite out there. My previous jobs have all been mandatory on-site, with a mix of hands-on procedures and computer-based work. Relatively soon, I’ll be moving to a position that is both 100% desk work and remote (full-time WFH is, for many reasons, not for me, so I’ll be joining a co-working space). This job is a great fit in many ways and I’m excited about it, but I’m looking for ideas of how to make 100% desk work sustainable. I’m a very active person, so I think I’m going to miss all the motion during …

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Do we have to return to the office or be fired? Is it always the case that workers have to decide whether to comply with return-to-office mandates, or leave or risk being fired? My large, multinational company has instituted a return-to-office mandate, and recently released their policy regarding compliance and punishment. Some aspects seem so unreasonable and obviously intended to reduce headcount that I wonder if they are legal. This company has many subsidiary offices across multiple countries. During the quarantine years, we hired a lot of remote workers. One subsidiary office was even officially made a 100% remo…

Some years we talked about people who get weirdly competitive at work, and I’ve been sitting on this great collections of stories ever since, so here it is! 1. The game of tag It was a company team-building event, they made us play tag. Some senior directors got so into it they ran FACE FIRST into a wall. And cringily after that, ANOTHER senior director actually went and tagged the poor man while he was nearly unconscious on the floor. I remember nothing about my very temporary work there, but would probably never forget that game of tag. 2. The raffle disappointment At Christmas, we used to draw names out of a hat for small prizes. Soaps, $5 gift cards, small crafts,…

A reader writes: I manage a small team of customer service/account managers. I have a long-term client who is quite particular and has dealt with one of my employees for a few years now. Recently, I’ve brought a new employee on board and we decided to transition this account over to her. The client sent me a polite, but very stern email after about one week, requesting to be put back in the original employee’s hands immediately. Nothing really happened to prompt this, the new employee hasn’t done anything wrong, and our strategic goal for this year is to split up clients in a way that means she should be handled by the new employee. I personally think it’s quite rude to…

A reader writes: I’m writing for some advice on how to help my mentee set expectations at work. I work at a small educational site. Alice came to us through an independent living program for young adults with disabilities, and she was absolutely fantastic as a volunteer. She was extremely passionate about the work and already had independently picked up a bunch of extremely niche skills (for anonymity let’s say it’s reconstructing historical rice sculptures) that would normally take years of training, so most of the guidance I was giving her was more in relation to her soft skills and building confidence in her own abilities. She also has A Lot going on in her personal …

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Coworker keeps suggesting I should babysit his kids I work in an office environment, somewhat causal, but we have absolutely no involvement with anything children-related. So I have no idea why a manager here seems to think that I would be interested in babysitting for him in the office or outside of work. For reference, I’m a mid-20s woman in a mostly male office. The manager in question, Fergus, is above me in the hierarchy but not my boss (I report to two people above him). I’ve known for a while that he has two young children, and the nature of our jobs is either long hours, an odd schedule, or both. He has often …