Performance Tracking and Feedback

A reader writes: I manage two departments, each led by a supervisor — one a married man and the other a single woman. While I work in a separate building, I’ve received numerous reports from my boss, peers, and direct reports regarding their behavior. They are inseparable: taking all breaks together, sharing a single desk, whispering closely, and staying late whenever the other does. The optics have become a significant distraction. Seven different people — including those outside our organization — have commented on the inappropriateness of their closeness, with some making “get a room” jokes. While their deliverables aren’t egregiously late, I often experience delays…

Remember the letter-writer who needed to tell a new employee he’s not cut out for the job? The first update was here, and here’s the latest. After far too long, I was able to terminate Tom. As the “fun” project wore on, he started telling me he was overwhelmed, and I started stepping in to do increasingly more of his work. Don’t ask me why I found his requests for help so compelling, I’m still mad at myself about falling for them. After delivering the “needs improvement” conversation, his work improved for a few months. But then something snapped, and he completely fell below the minimum threshold. Multiple important meetings no-showed. Entire afternoons where I was un…

A reader writes: My manager, Katherine, is a C-suite level executive who joined the organization eight months ago. She was previously my skip-level manager (former boss’s boss), but due to a large RIF/company restructuring four months ago, my former manager is no longer with the organization, and another colleague and I were asked to co-lead the remaining team, reporting to Katherine. Before the restructuring, I had met her maybe twice, and at the time of my recent performance review, this was my second 1-1. Many of the projects I worked on last year are no longer considered company priorities after this restructuring. During my performance review, Katherine admitted th…

A reader writes: A few years ago, I appeared in a series of videos about “how I got my job.” My job is pretty niche and there really isn’t a ton of institutional information about it yet, so it got a lot of attention. Since then, I’ve consistently gotten two to three LinkedIn messages per week from people looking to break into my field. About 20% are just saying that they found the videos inspiring (which I love to hear!), 30% are just asking to connect, and the remainder are asking for more career advice — but in a very general way. Think “I’d love to get your thoughts on how to break into the industry/get hired at your company.” I’m of two minds: I really want to hel…

A reader writes: I left my last job after 3.5 months despite receiving consistently high praise privately from the director (my direct manager) of my department. At a year-end all-hands meeting where the entire company of at least 70+ people attended and each department gave a status update, I did not get any public recognition in my department of four. One person was called a Salesforce “wizard” and another was praised for doing the hard work of helping set up the infrastructure. The director had only been there two months longer than me, and no one in our team worked there for longer than one year. Needless to say, this was hurtful and humiliating. In just 3.5 month…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker is in a cult and it’s affecting my work A new junior staff person joined my department about a year ago. About six months in, they asked if they could start working remotely because because they had been asked to help start a new church across the country. This employee is quite young and this is their first job after college. They were initially very dedicated to their work, but since moving, they have dropped the ball on multiple projects, frequently ask for time off and don’t make up their hours, and have just generally been performing poorly. I was starting to think they had just checked out and weren’…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My male coworker takes his family everywhere, and it makes him late for work events I am a woman in STEM and have a coworker, Fergus, who has a stay-at-home-wife and a toddler. They currently live out-of-state with his in-laws, and when he travels — whether it’s to a conference, work event, or just an in-office event — he always brings his wife and kid. This leads him to often not arriving to these events that start at 8 or 9 am until 11 or 12 because he went to brunch with the fam. My (male) boss finds it endearing, despite it often leaving the rest of us idle for hours waiting on him and often seems to overlook wome…

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. How can I manage digs about remote working and return-to-office? I’m a woman in my 60s, and before Covid I was doing a long, multi‑leg commute five days a week. Working primarily from home has dramatically improved my health, energy, productivity, and ability to manage everyday life. However, now my workplace is requiring us to be in the office more, and I’m not sure how to handle a few friends who make unsupportive comments about it. Most of my friends understand and are considerate, but a small group repeatedly dismisses my concerns. They tell me to retire, “suck it up,” or insist that office work is better for coll…

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. Is it out of touch to expect student workers to check their email? I work at a fairly small college, and I’m noticing that more and more students aren’t checking or responding to their email regularly. Some of my colleagues say that they have to text the students in order to get a response. I really don’t want to do that unless it’s a time-sensitive situation. My instinct is to tell the students (the ones who work for me anyway) that email is still a really normal business tool and they need to get used to it because it will be part of their professional lives for a while to come. But I also recognize that I’ve worked…

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: This Is Not About Us, by Allegra Goodman. An estrangement between two sisters over apple cake affects three generations of a family over decades. Each chapter explores a different family member, but all the stories are interconnected. I loved it. (Amazon, Bookshop) * I earn a commission if you use those links. The post weekend open thread – March 21-22, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

A reader writes: The company I currently work for was perfect for me when I started in the corporate world — low-key, the owner is very hands-off, and my bosses let me work without micromanaging. But recently we’ve become a lot bigger while still keeping that “small business” mindset. Our profit has more than quadrupled in the past seven years, but the number of employees in headquarters has not increased in response (we’re still fewer than 20 people). A daily catch phrase is, “It’ll slow down eventually … right?” It’s wearing me down to a point where I need to find another job, and I have started to activity job search. My concern is, I honestly do the job of three pe…

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I am looking for advice on managing ADHD at work, but the caveat is that I’m still nursing a baby, so most medication is off the table and when I do stop (hopefully soon – he’s over a year old and I’m actively working on weaning), I know it may take me months to find something that works. So I am really looking for non-medication strategies in the meantime. I recently got diagnosed with ADHD (in my late thirties) after having my second child and going off the executive functioning cliff deep end (thanks, hormones!). I’ve always had symptoms and have nearly always managed okay enough, but after coming back to…

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: Whidbey, by T Kira Madden. Three women connected to one man navigate the aftermath of sexual assault. (Amazon, Bookshop) * I earn a commission if you use those links. The post weekend open thread – April 4-5, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Our new work stations will be outside our building’s security screening I work in a government office, in a building that does full security screening of every person who comes in, with metal detectors and an x-ray machine for their bags. My department does some cashiering. As part of renovations to the building, they are adding cashier stations to our office that will be pre-security, meaning people can come directly to us off the street with no screening. We’re assured these stations will operate as check-only, no cash, but I’m still nervous about doing this. I’ve expressed my concerns but have been told our departm…

A reader writes: Recently my manager asked me to help revise a job posting and the hiring process because the last two people we hired left only a few weeks after starting. One said she didn’t think our workplace had a professional environment, and the other said she realized her values didn’t align with the company. Since I’m the most recent successful hire, my manager wants me to help her understand what was different about how I was selected. You’re probably assuming my workplace must be toxic or terrible, but honestly it’s the most fun place I’ve ever worked, and that might actually be the problem. Nothing about it fits the usual idea of a bad workplace, but it is d…

Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. What to do about serious problems you never see firsthand (#2 at the link) Great advice and so many great responses – thank you! it is indeed nonprofit early childhood education, with infant, toddler and preschool classrooms. I got two big things from this conversation – I am indeed not crazy, this is a solvable problem. And I got some strong language for how to name what is going on and try to shift things next time. Here is what I ended up doing this time: With this director there had been a previous situation where I had looped in the supervisor, and the director was upset, why hadn’t I talked to her, she thought w…

A reader writes: My brother-in-law works for a company of about 600, with branches of 80 or so in several cities across North America. His department had three employees who served their branch in an HR-type capacity. One employee moved, leaving only him and his manager to handle their caseload. This was okay. Then the manager left. The branch managers called my brother-in-law in and told him that he was now the acting manager but there would be no pay raise “at this time” but they appreciated his work and knew he could handle this opportunity. While the caseload on him went up, he was able to shift work to other branches so there were no late nights or long hours. Stil…

A reader writes: As a manager, new parent, and generally busy person, I work some strange hours. For example, yesterday I was online at 2 am (as my daughter woke me up during the night and I decided to use some time to clear my work inbox ahead of a busy Monday) and 10 pm (as I finished early to play with my daughter but needed to meet a deadline). I don’t expect these kinds of hours from my team or want to encourage people to work outside of hours if it doesn’t suit them, but sometimes these are the hours that suit me! What can and should I do to make it clear that what I do isn’t what I expect from the team and that following my example won’t have any impact on my opi…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. I don’t want to stay in a haunted hotel on a work trip I’m a junior employee at a smaller firm (100-200 employees). I travel about once a month for work and typically stay in generic hotels. I’m heading to a small town on my next trip and the project manager suggested we stay at a cute old historic property. Not a problem, I go to book, and it says the hotel has a friendly ghost. I am absolutely petrified of ghosts and paranormal things — think years and years of weekly therapy. The two people I’m traveling with are more senior than I am, and I’m a little embarrassed to say, “Hey, I know you’ve stayed here before but …

A reader writes: I’m a relatively new manager, and I’m still finding my footing when it comes to shifting from being an individual contributor to overseeing a team. One thing I struggle with is knowing when it’s appropriate to delegate tasks to my team versus doing them myself. I manage a communications team of four at a university. When my manager assigns me work — things like drafting communications on a specific topic or reviewing copy from another department — I’m never sure whether she expects me to do it personally or for me to assign it to someone on my team. I feel like she is expecting me to delegate them: these tasks fall squarely within my team’s remit, and I…

A reader writes: I manage an employee who, to put it frankly, has a bad attitude. Negative about everything: our job, our clients, life in general. A constant rain cloud. He brings down morale quite a bit, and other employees have made comments to me about how hard it is to work with him. Where I struggle is that I have a lot of sympathy for him and the many health problems he has been facing the last few years. He was in a car accident that he sustained pretty big injuries from, was diagnosed with a chronic disease which causes him constant pain, and also has had to deal with the sudden loss of a sibling. I feel like I would kind of hate the world, too. How do I addres…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker got promoted and I didn’t even get to interview for it I’ve been in my job about five years. I’m in a specialized role in my large organization, along with Rachel, who I helped hire and train. We each handle separate areas. It’s been rewarding work, and I feel like I’ve found something I’m good at. I like the mission, and the pay and benefits are good. But the office politics are a struggle for me, and we’ve been going through some big changes with a reorganization and significant leadership changes. As part of the reorganization, last year Rachel and I were absorbed into a different department. While I g…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker is charging personal purchases to our team I work in higher ed on a small team. All of us are able to make purchases up to a certain amount with little to no oversight. I have suspected that my coworker has bought things for herself. It seemed like a few small things here and there, a $30 hand cream, essential oils, things that didn’t seem to have a business purpose. Recently I purchased an expensive item (with permission) for the office. She said someone asked her where it was from and asked if I could send her the link. A week later, a box arrives with this very item. I look up her purchase order, which…

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. The post open thread – March 27, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

If you could earn thousands of dollars more a year just by having a two-minute conversation, would you do it? That might sound like an easy “yes,” but for a lot of people, the answer, surprisingly, is no. At Slate today, I wrote about people who literally never negotiate their salary when they’re offered a job or haven’t had a raise in a long time. Instead, they accept the first number an employer offers, because they’re worried that they’ll look greedy or mercenary — even though the whole reason we work is for pay! You can read it here. The post there’s only one way to get more money at work, and some people won’t do it appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full …