Performance Tracking and Feedback

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Just sharing this tweet from Washington Post reporter Jeff Stein for federal government workers about Elon Musk’s “deferred resignation” offer. (Don’t take it! It’s still a trap.) Also, if you remember the letter-writer who worked at Twitter when Elon Musk took over, that same person has sent in this note: I just wanted to thank you for posting about what federal workers who are currently under attack can do. The former Twitter employees I know have all spent the past couple of weeks reliving the Twitter takeover from 2 years ago but on a much more widespread and terrible scale. I want to say this i…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Canceling a women’s group because of DEI concerns I’m a PhD student and it seems like my university is trying to cancel the Women in Computer Science networking group that I run. They’re going about it in a really weird way: rather than directly saying “this is illegal D.E.I.,” they’re trying to send us on a bureaucratic runaround to maintain the status quo of funding and booking rooms. We’re in New England, so I suspect it would be locally unpopular to bluntly state that they’re cancelling women’s groups due to D.E.I. How do I fight this? Just dela…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. Should people be fired for big, public mistakes? I’m curious about your thoughts on Major League Baseball’s recent blunder. They released a new series of hats that have the logo imposed on top of the team location. For the Texas Rangers, they did not think through the word they would create. Tetas is a slang word for breasts in Spanish. If you were managing a team that let this slip through, how would you handle it? Would people be fired for something like this? I’m not a fan of firing people for single mistakes in their work (conduct is in a diff…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I (a woman in my early 30s) work in a traditionally male environment, although there are a decent amount of women working there too. Recently my work has started focusing more on menopause support/awareness — there’s a menopause support group, “recognizing signs and symptoms” posters in the women’s toilets, etc. I think that’s great. My manager has been making comments about menopause that really, really bother me. Things like, “Well, I better write that down because as a woman of a certain age, if I don’t I’ll forget it” or “I must have forgotten to do that — it comes with the menop…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. How do I balance work and socializing at hybrid team meetings? I (a young-looking woman) lead a team of about 15, composed of 3-4 smaller sub-teams that collaborate on various parts of the project. About half the team work remotely; a quarter at Site A, including my deputy and me; and a quarter at Site B. Team members range from junior to mid-career, heavy on junior. We have at least one meeting per project topic area per week for tracking progress and working through more complex issues together. I have a hard time closing down the first “social” …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I am a manager on a team where there are two managers and five individual contributors: Buffy, Cordelia, Xander, Willow, and Anya. Buffy and Willow are very good friends. They joined the team at around the same time, about two years ago. Cordelia joined the team just under a year ago and quickly got adopted by Buffy and Willow as “one of the gang.” They have similar tastes and are always lending each other books, talking about shared interests, etc. Xander has been in and out of the team, but is well integrated socially with the others. Anya joined the team straight out of college in…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have worked in nonprofits for the entirety of my career (~15 years). I’m a highly mission-driven person, so I am generally a lot happier in my work when I feel strongly connected to the nonprofit’s aims. As an example, I’ve worked at both a public library and a private college, and I was much happier at the library even though the hours were longer, the pay less, and the work more menial — just because I felt like my work was contributing to a better cause. I was recently hired at a very small nonprofit that, on paper, seemed to tick all the boxes for me. However, having been there…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss is great in some ways but is he crossing lines? I’m trying to figure out if my manager is interested in me as more than a coworker, or if the lines he crosses are just a part of his personality. I’ve been with my company as a general manager for eight months, hired into a lower position and immediately promoted by this man. He is always kind and funny with me. He calls me awesome, amazing, sunshine, tells me how funny I am, tells me I’m tough, and that he wants to make my life easier. And these are just the things he regularly says. He is ne…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. People complain that I don’t want to be at work social events I’m in a senior leadership role, and have been for the last six years. I keep running into the same problem and I’d love your advice. I don’t enjoy social activities at work (Christmas parties, picnics, etc.), and I also don’t like corporate retreats. I’d rather do my tasks, as I’m very busy. I’m very much in the minority. I always encourage my staff to participate. I do attend, but it’s out of obligation. People notice and then complain to my boss, who keeps talking to me about my part…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: About four months ago I hired a new employee, Arnold. He interviewed very well, and the other interviewers on the panel agreed he was the best candidate. However now I am starting to see some serious gaps in ability. The biggest issue is that Arnold totally forgets entire conversations we’ve had. Some examples: • I told him in June that he needed to plan the agenda for the team meeting in late July. A few weeks into July, I asked how the agenda was coming, and he said that was the first time he heard about it. I pointed him to our shared notes document from our 1:1 conversation in Ju…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Do you think it’s a red flag when a team in a smaller company immediately drops you into a group text on your personal phone upon hiring? The context is that I’m very happy in my mid-level position at my very not-toxic Fortune 100 company. I like the work and the people and while I wouldn’t hang out with a few of these folks for recreational coffee, we’re Work Friends. I’ve worked for smaller companies and have found them to always be cliquey and toxic and in each other’s business. Like high-stakes high school, where instead of losing head cheerleader, you lose your job. For me the …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. With more people being called back to offices where they’re expected to share crowded spaces with coworkers — including sharing desks — let’s talk about shared space horror stories! Maybe you share a desk with someone who pinned up deeply personal love notes from their partner all over your shared space … or set the screensaver on your shared computer to be photos of herself in a bikini … or maybe you had a boss who “was constantly leaving open the very explicit romance e-novels she was reading on the shared workstation so you’d sit down to start your shift and suddenly you’re reading about parts quive…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss told me to bring my sick four-year-old to work with me I want to start off by saying I am the absolute backbone of our store and everyone, including my boss, knows it. My boss has the flu right now and my four-year-old has been sick. She woke up crying, feverish, snotty, etc. I texted my boss at 4 am (I was scheduled to open at 10:30 am) explaining that my child’s sickness had taken a turn for the worse and asked if there was a possibility that anyone else could cover. She responded that there was no one besides me who could work and I would…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. An employee is out to get my star performer, and no one else cares (first update) I thought it could be good for the folks who were predicting catastrophe with Dave to hear what actually happened. Sometimes situations aren’t ideal but that doesn’t mean doom either. I respected Tina’s wishes and did not go to HR. Given some of the vehement responses, I did extra legwork with Maria and HR contacts at previous companies in the same industry before making my final decision. Quoting one HR professional when I asked about noting it in Dave’s record in cas…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. Boss said, “Well, someone’s parents didn’t love them” about me In preparation for a team-building retreat, all employees in my department were asked to submit a baby photo for a “match the baby photo to the employee” icebreaker activity. The request for baby photos was framed as a requirement, not an opt-in request. I wasn’t able to get a baby photo because my mom is my only living family, and we are estranged. The request stirred up some *feelings* and left me feeling pretty crummy for a few days. I considered saying something to my boss about how …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: What do I do about a staffer who has a history of personal drama and blurring professional boundaries who’s about to be added to the department I manage? According to a number of people I know who have worked with “Lee” over the past couple of years, while Lee is okay at their basic day-to-day job responsibilities, they are a bringer of discord on a personal level wherever they go. A year and a half ago, they were let go from a supervisory position within another organization for sexual harassment. Lee is late 30s and their former workplace had a lot of young 20-somethings just learn…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: What are your thoughts and the etiquette around getting drinks with coworkers when you’re in leadership position? I’m a female, on a younger side, in a leadership role at a small-to-medium size organization. We recently had a company event, after which 5–10 people went out for drinks and stayed for a couple of hours. It was just great to see some colleagues that are often in different locations, and most of them do not report to me. A while later, an exec mentioned that he thought it was inappropriate to go out drinking with subordinates. I understand that colleagues may not always …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I would love to hear stories from people who made the transition from nonprofit work to for-profit work, as I am considering that transition myself. I’ve only ever worked in this sector and have a master’s in Nonprofit Management (not even an MBA) so the idea of changing sectors is really overwhelming, but I know people have done it before. Readers who have made this transition, please share advice in the comment section. View the full article

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I recently had a recruiter reach out to me about a job. I’m not really looking right now, but I figured I’d see what they had to say. I had my first interview virtually, and progressed a few days later to an in-person interview. It went well, but towards the end, the hiring manager asked if there was anything that would prevent me from accepting an offer if it were extended. Am I wrong to hate this question? Side note: the recruiter had been very clear that I shouldn’t ask any questions about what the company can do for me in the interviews, as they would handle all negotiations for…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. My new job has so much drama it made the local news I started a job as an accounting manager less than a month ago. I had been out of work for a while. I was let go at my previous job, I think because my boss didn’t like or need me. I’m a quiet, anxious person and she was the opposite. I was still on probation there and it was a shock. So, I’ve been looking for a new position but also working contract and doing well. I interviewed for one particular job I thought was a good fit. The hiring manager and I hit it off right away. I felt she was an empa…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. I hate my new job — can I go back to my old one? I worked at a company for over three years. Internally they have their issues and I had my share of frustrations, but it is basically a well oiled machine. As far as growth, there is not much, but I was paid well and had flexibility with my hours, although absolutely no work from home and an hour commute each way. Three months ago, a colleague who worked with me at this company and left two years prior, asked me to send my resume to her so she could pass it along to her boss. She only had good things…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I’ve been applying to new jobs for about six months and finally got an offer for a job that I was genuinely excited about; it’s for a position that would be a step up in both title and responsibility, would let me work on interesting projects, and even would let me use a skill I went to school for but haven’t really been able to use professionally up until now. When they sent me the formal job offer, the salary was a bit more than I’m making now, but I’ve always heard that it’s smart to try to negotiate for more money because this is the easiest time to get it (versus after you’re al…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Remember the letter-writer whose anti-vax employee was pressuring a coworker not to vaccinate her baby? Here’s the update. I really appreciated your advice and several of the thoughts from the commenters as well. I have weekly one-on-ones with each member of my team, so after reading your response, I used that next meeting with Cordelia as an opportunity to step in, after taking care of our usual business. I used the framing about how if the roles were reversed, if Dawn didn’t want to vaccinate and someone was pressuring her to, I would need to shut that conversation down, because Dawn deserves to b…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. I’m getting a flood of questions about resumes, so here are seven resume questions and answers. 1. Can my resume just list my last two jobs and leave the earlier ones off? The company I’m currently employed by is closing. It was sudden and, while not completely unexpected, it’s still a blow. I’m dusting off ye olde resume, but I’m torn on what to leave in and what to leave out. The issue is my age. I was at the employer before this one for 25 years, until they, too, closed. I was lucky with CurrentJob because the owner is my age, and the ageism that is rampant, (yes, yes it is) wasn’t an issue. Now,…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I work in an office with two full-time employees, a manager, and 80+ contract employees. Jane, the other full-time employee, and I both support the contract employees in vital, yet different ways. Let’s say that she schedules appointments, and I process payments. Each office in our company has a scheduler and a payment processor, and while both are technically hourly, each cohort has different duties and perhaps a different culture. Payment processors have many more responsibilities than schedulers, and both are occasionally asked to pick up an outside task or six. Here’s where thing…