Performance Tracking and Feedback

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer who was inheriting an employee who causes chaos wherever they go? Here’s the update. Thank you so much for taking my question several months ago about having a “chaos employee” forced upon my department. I have an update and a feeling there will likely be a more dramatic addition some years down the road. I ended up talking my department out of taking on Pat! We dodged the bullet! I didn’t mention to my super…

A reader writes: Two years ago, I began managing Craig, who had been doing the same tasks day in and out for a decade. He hadn’t adapted to new technology, best practices, or industry trends. My first order of business was to coach him and challenge him to grow and learn. For more than a year, we built up a great trajectory. People saw how much his work improved and commented on it frequently, and said he seemed revitalized in many ways. His progress gave me a lot of hope that he could become good at the modern demands of his role. Then about six months ago, Craig suddenly reverted to his old patterns. It was as if the prior year of progress got completely wiped out. On…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer whose employee was demoralized after a promotion was dangled in front her and then yanked away (#3 at the link)? Here’s the update. I met with Maple, the head of our office, and was able to uncover the truth about why they decided not to promote Joy (though it took some deeper questioning to get to it). It was your third possibility: Maple had concerns with Joy during the decision-making process. Maple felt th…

I’m on vacation. Here are some past letters that I’m making new again, rather than leaving them to wilt in the archives. 1. My staff found me bound and gagged after a robbery I’m a 32-year-old woman who was recently made manager of a small financial firm. Being fairly young, I’ve had to overcome skepticism and sexism from my staff, but after three months I’ve established a reputation for being efficient, fair, and a bit stern. It’s worked, I’m respected, and we all get along very well. Several mornings a week, I arrive very early for some alone time. Last Thursday, I arrived at 7 a.m., (we open at 10), and was “greeted” by a couple of thugs who demanded money, bank car…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. How do I manage petty behavior between two employees who dislike each other? For context, I am not the manager of either of these employees, just an innocent bystander trying to help the manager figure this out. The feedback that was given to both of these employees was relatively similar to what you suggested. Basically, the manager focused not on the specific incidents, but instead on telling these employees that the expectation is that they treat all coworkers with profe…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer who was afraid of flying and and their job required a lot of travel? Here’s the update. Many commenters wondered why friends, family and mentors recommended I accept the new job. Despite the travel, it had clear benefits over my prior position. To name a few, I would be paid about $17k more base salary, would have a 5% bigger bonus, a better title, more responsibilities and I’d be fully remote. I had also declined another offer that had similar compensation but would’ve required three days in offic…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer asking whether she had to share her story on a “women in industry” panel? Here’s the update. So … I ended up doing the panel. I talked to multiple trusted women at work and outside of work, who almost always encouraged me to do it, even if just for the experience and to showcase myself. For what it’s worth (now that the panel is over), I work in the construction industry as a superintendent. My job is to organ…

A reader writes: I recently realized that one of the managers who reports to me, Blake, uses abusive language with his employees. Blake’s employee fear that if he knows they have reported this to me, it will create a further problem for them. I need help on how to give feedback to Blake without giving him the feeling that I came to know this from his team members. I answer this question — and three others — over at Inc. today, where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and sometimes updating/expanding my answers to them). You can read it here. Other questions I’m answering there today include: Interviewing with the team I’…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer whose boss was pushing them to fundraise from their family and friends and tap their personal network for prizes for raffles? Here’s the update. In the months during which my boss was pressuring me to solicit gifts, I managed to procure exactly one in-kind gift from a local business I frequent, and I was so awkward doing it. There’s a local yarn shop that I frequent, so I intended to ask the owner for a donati…

The final votes are in, and the CEO keeps asking young male employees to try her breast milk won the Worst Boss of 2025 Award, with 57% of the vote in the final match-up. Coming in second, the company that made summer interns wear bikinis captured 43% of the vote. The runners-up, who all managed to be pretty terrible themselves: my boss told me to stop having sex with my boyfriend or quit my job boss says it’s unacceptable not to meet all deadlines, no matter how unreasonable my boss made me verify that I’m really exercising I was written up for having a visible thong outside of work can I ask my boss not to scream at me with her door open? my boss said I’m threat…

I’m on vacation. Here are some past letters that I’m making new again, rather than leaving them to wilt in the archives. 1. Coworkers are leaving love notes for each other I recently started working in a high-end retail setting selling a luxury item. The team that I’m working with seems really great for the most part, except for this one young couple who can’t seem to keep their private lives out of the workplace. It’s not enough that everyone knows that they’re dating; one of them has begun taping small love notes to cash registers that are shared between 5-6 of us, in full view of our customers. Now in fairness, the notes are usually pretty short and subtle (“Happy T…

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. The post weekend open thread – December 13-14, 2025 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. My office has a wall of shame with the names of people who are late or out sick We had a Very Ballsy coworker bring it up in a staff meeting, demanding to know whether they preferred we infect all the people, children, and families we worked with every day in order to avoid being shamed for our own illness. (Yes, this was a preschool/daycare.) She also pointedly asked why *management* who called out sick or were otherwise not present were not included on the list. They did …

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. The post open thread – December 12, 2025 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s the final round of the Worst Boss of 2025 voting. We’ve narrowed the pool from eight nominees to two (see results from the first round and second round). The two finalists go head-to-head below. A Frightful Face-Off – The Nominees: the CEO keeps asking young male employees to try her breast milk my company makes summer interns wear bikinis If the voting isn’t showing up for you, you can also vote directly here. The post vote for the worst boss of 2025: the finals appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

I’m on vacation. Here are some past letters that I’m making new again, rather than leaving them to wilt in the archives. 1. My company won’t call me Doctor or Lord I was hoping that you could help me with a question I have regarding the use of honorifics in workplace documentation. I have recently acquired a new honorific, and my employers are refusing to use it on the documents that I have requested it be used on. I have legal documents that also show that my title is a fully legal one and can be used on official government documents up to and including my passport. Is there anything that I can do to get my employers to use it? Specifically, I have a doctorate and I a…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. My job wants me to hit up everyone I know for money and other help So it’s been a bit of a twisty path since I wrote in. I’ll start by thanking Alison and the commentariat for really helpful advice. The small group meetings with the explicit purpose of sharing our personal contacts and their locations kept being postponed. Casual discussions about the principles of the project continued during other meetings, and I began to lay the groundwork suggested in the advice and dis…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer wondering how to keep cat fur off all her work clothes (#5 at the link)? Here’s the update. You were kind enough to post my question and your readers responded with a wealth of information and advice. Since I’m retiring in a few weeks, and cat fur on office clothes will no longer be a problem, I thought an update might be in order. Plus, who doesn’t love update season?! The number one piece of advice I receiv…

All year long, I’ve made a weekly book recommendation when kicking off the weekend open thread. These aren’t work-related books; they’re just books I like, mostly fiction. Sometimes they’re books that I’m in the middle of reading, and other times they’re just long-standing favorites. Here’s the complete list of what I’ve recommended this year (maybe in time for holiday gift-shopping!). I’ve bolded my favorites of the favorites. (Interestingly, with some notable exceptions, it appears that what I was reading got lighter and lighter as the year went on.) Long Bright River, by Liz Moore. It’s SO GOOD! It’s the story of two sisters, close as children but estranged as adults…

It’s a special “where are you now?” season at Ask a Manager and I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer whose employer who laid them off and then wanted them to sign an indemnification (#2 at the link)? Here’s the update. Your advice was incredibly helpful. My previous manager continued to send me multiple followup texts regarding the indemnification that felt very guilt-tripping (reminding me they could not proceed with the critical business operation unless I signed and agreed). I did not reply to any of the tex…

In the spirit of the season, let’s hear about workplace gift debacles. Did a game of Secret Santa end in tears? Did a coworker throw a tantrum when she didn’t win a raffle? Were you given a jar of mold as a gift? Did you receive an oil painting of your coworker’s mother in the style of Napoleon? These are all real stories that we’ve heard here in the past. Now you must top them. Share your weirdest or funniest story related to gifts in the office in the comments. The post office holiday gift-giving stories: worst gifts and weirdest gifts appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

I’m on vacation. Here are some past letters that I’m making new again, rather than leaving them to wilt in the archives. 1. Nameplate drama I work for a very large company. My department is small and very specialized. The rest of company either doesn’t know we exist or, if they do, doesn’t understand what we do. My department has been the “stepchild” of the company. There have been growth and leadership changes that affected morale for many years. There’s a lack of role clarity, communication, overstepping of management boundaries, no policies or procedures, reactiveness, finger pointing, etc. We have one long-term employee, Jan, who is known for being rude and sarcast…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. Men are gross in our non-gendered bathrooms (#3 at the link) The bathrooms in our building continue to be a source of mirth and disbelief. As well as continued seat-up, shake-it-all-about behavior, there’s been the (female) facilities manager who refused to accept that “all gender” means sanitary bins should be available in all stalls (“men don’t want to look at those”), and building-wide reminders to use the supplied brushes to remove anything you might leave clinging to t…

Several years ago, a reader shared with us this epic email that was sent by their company’s boss after a holiday party gone terribly awry, and as we enter the holiday season we remember its glory. “This happened about ten years ago, but the email I received from our boss was so epic I preserved it. Context: The second year I worked at this company, our holiday party was held on a dinner cruise boat. Our boss footed the bill for dinner and an open bar, and a few other companies also hosted their own parties on the boat at the same time. Since I was underage at the time, I did not drink, and actually left early with my date. Everything was fine when I left. The Monday aft…

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. There will be more posts than usual this week, so keep checking back throughout the day. Remember the letter-writer whose friend hired them but wasn’t paying what they had agreed on? Here’s the update. I’m happy to say that the outcome of the conversation with my now former boss was positive and I didn’t expect it to end as well as it did. Thank you, Alison, and everyone who provided helpful feedback. I respectfully brought up with my friend what she was thinking to do in terms of the summer when the days were longer and I…