Performance Tracking and Feedback

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Can I use a wedding photo — with a veil — as my work avatar? My company is fully remote, so they really encourage us to upload a headshot to our company chat service so people can put a face to the name. Would it look out of touch or immature to use a photo from my wedding? It’s probably the best I’ll ever look in any photo because of the professional hair and makeup and because it was taken by a professional photographer. But because of the veil, it’s very obviously a wedding photo. (I’d choose a shot without my husband in it.) I think some of my…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: About a year and a half ago, I was forced to lay off multiple employees. I was truly heartbroken to see most of them go. But there were two employees I swore I’d never hire back. They both did fairly decent work, but were bullies who fed off of one another’s bad behavior. They were constantly in my office explaining why they’d said something nasty to one of their coworkers or why they’d ransacked another’s belongings. They were also blatantly disrespectful to me. One was far worse than the other, though. Now that we’re hiring again, employees have contacted me and asked for their job…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I’ve been a manager at my company for 13 years. I have a team of five direct reports and meet with them for one-on-ones every one to two weeks. We review projects, develop strategies for hurdles, discuss what’s working and what’s not, and where they would like to see their careers go. Recently we had our annual reviews where I create their annual development plans. These reviews are quite involved and build on conversations we’ve had throughout the year. At the conclusion of the reviews, a formal letter from HR is drafted with the annual salary increase and general “happy to have you …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. View the full article

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: Today, during a screensharing session with my new employee, Barb, I saw something inappropriate on her screen and did not speak up. I was so dumbfounded that I just quickly wrapped up our call. I’m almost sure I saw her chat session with a coworker with explicit reference to private body parts. Both the screenshare software and chat software are part of the same company-provided system; it’s typically used for training and collaboration. Should I say anything to Barb? Or try to forget I ever saw anything? Since my view of the chat window happened very quickly, and I have no “proof,” …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss is great in some ways but is he crossing lines? I’m trying to figure out if my manager is interested in me as more than a coworker, or if the lines he crosses are just a part of his personality. I’ve been with my company as a general manager for eight months, hired into a lower position and immediately promoted by this man. He is always kind and funny with me. He calls me awesome, amazing, sunshine, tells me how funny I am, tells me I’m tough, and that he wants to make my life easier. And these are just the things he regularly says. He is ne…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s hard to get real-world information about what jobs pay. Online salary websites are often inaccurate, and people can get weird when you ask them directly. So to take some of the mystery out of salaries, it’s the annual Ask a Manager salary survey. Fill out the form below to anonymously share your salary and other relevant info. (Do not leave your info in the comments section! If you can’t see the survey questions, try this link instead.) When you’re done, you can view all the responses in a sortable spreadsheet. Loading… View the full article

A reader recently sent me a cover letter that I want to share as a great example of explaining a maybe surprising job history: she had started in one field, then left it, then was trying to come back to it. First, though, the caveats I’ve learned to give when sharing these: The writer has allowed me to share this as a favor to me and to readers. Please remember she’s a real person when you’re commenting. This writer’s voice is her voice. It will not be your voice, and that’s part of the point. There is no single cover letter in the world that all hiring managers will love or that would be the right fit for every employer and every industry. But I receive letters all th…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Offering a job to multiple people and giving it to the first one who accepts Decades ago, in the early 2000s, my friend was offered an assistant professor position at a university. She was told that the same job was being offered to several other candidates too, and that only the first person to accept the offer would be hired. Presumably as soon as one person accepted, the other offers would be withdrawn. I have never seen this practice anywhere else. This makes me curious: is this legal? (We are in the U.S.) What do you think of employers doing t…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. Perks for remote employees only Our company works mostly remotely. Employees who live locally come in one day a week. A few departments’ employees are allowed to live elsewhere in the country (this rule does not apply to all departments). Several times a year, all staff are required to come into the office for the full week. Employees who live outside the area get paid hotel rooms near the office, and expense all of their meals. Local employees, however, are required to pay for their lunch every day, as well as the additional costs of commuting for …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. How do I balance work and socializing at hybrid team meetings? I (a young-looking woman) lead a team of about 15, composed of 3-4 smaller sub-teams that collaborate on various parts of the project. About half the team work remotely; a quarter at Site A, including my deputy and me; and a quarter at Site B. Team members range from junior to mid-career, heavy on junior. We have at least one meeting per project topic area per week for tracking progress and working through more complex issues together. I have a hard time closing down the first “social” …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: What are your thoughts and the etiquette around getting drinks with coworkers when you’re in leadership position? I’m a female, on a younger side, in a leadership role at a small-to-medium size organization. We recently had a company event, after which 5–10 people went out for drinks and stayed for a couple of hours. It was just great to see some colleagues that are often in different locations, and most of them do not report to me. A while later, an exec mentioned that he thought it was inappropriate to go out drinking with subordinates. I understand that colleagues may not always …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. An employee is out to get my star performer, and no one else cares (first update) I thought it could be good for the folks who were predicting catastrophe with Dave to hear what actually happened. Sometimes situations aren’t ideal but that doesn’t mean doom either. I respected Tina’s wishes and did not go to HR. Given some of the vehement responses, I did extra legwork with Maria and HR contacts at previous companies in the same industry before making my final decision. Quoting one HR professional when I asked about noting it in Dave’s record in cas…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: About four months ago I hired a new employee, Arnold. He interviewed very well, and the other interviewers on the panel agreed he was the best candidate. However now I am starting to see some serious gaps in ability. The biggest issue is that Arnold totally forgets entire conversations we’ve had. Some examples: • I told him in June that he needed to plan the agenda for the team meeting in late July. A few weeks into July, I asked how the agenda was coming, and he said that was the first time he heard about it. I pointed him to our shared notes document from our 1:1 conversation in Ju…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. At a time when many Americans are struggling with rising costs of living, too many corporate executives are making it clear that they have no idea what life is like for their employees. We regularly hear accounts at AAM of out-of-touch executives who have alienated large portions of their workforce – often via clueless displays of wealth at the exact same time that they’re laying off employees, increasing health insurance costs, or otherwise squeezing their workers. At Slate today, I share some shocking examples of this, and talk about how it hurts both employers and employees. You can read it here. …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. My new job has so much drama it made the local news I started a job as an accounting manager less than a month ago. I had been out of work for a while. I was let go at my previous job, I think because my boss didn’t like or need me. I’m a quiet, anxious person and she was the opposite. I was still on probation there and it was a shock. So, I’ve been looking for a new position but also working contract and doing well. I interviewed for one particular job I thought was a good fit. The hiring manager and I hit it off right away. I felt she was an empa…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: We work in a completely open plan office, and are a PR/ creative services agency. There are separate meeting rooms, and two banks of unused desks round the side of the kitchen which feel slightly separate from the main seating area and are often used for hot desking or ad hoc meetings. We are mandated in the office three days a week. The guidelines are for everyone to be in Monday and Wednesday (these are our anchor days), and for teams to make an effort to choose the same third day to maximize the chances for in-person working on office days. We’re a small staff of around 25, so on…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have worked in nonprofits for the entirety of my career (~15 years). I’m a highly mission-driven person, so I am generally a lot happier in my work when I feel strongly connected to the nonprofit’s aims. As an example, I’ve worked at both a public library and a private college, and I was much happier at the library even though the hours were longer, the pay less, and the work more menial — just because I felt like my work was contributing to a better cause. I was recently hired at a very small nonprofit that, on paper, seemed to tick all the boxes for me. However, having been there…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I have a senior role in a large architecture and engineering company, and my partner is an academic. I sometimes ask him for advice on how to handle a thorny problem at work and occasionally ask him to read something I’ve written. My partner, on the other hand, regularly asks for my help in core aspects of his job — putting together a spreadsheet to organize marking for courses, fixing up formatting on PowerPoint slides, shortening grant applications to meet word-count requirements, drafting sensitive emails, etc. My partner also often talks through ideas for papers, which I really li…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I am a mother of three young children. Several years ago I took a step back in my career to work in a less high-pressure environment. The shift was incredible for my work life balance — I am much more present with my children, rarely bring home work stress, and am able to regularly take time away to volunteer at school events. We are financially secure and the money is decent. However, this organization frequently is a mess. I regularly find myself flabbergasted at how things that wouldn’t be an issue at other jobs become Big Things at this organization, requiring multiple meetings a…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I work at a small creative business with about 25 employees, Our structure is pretty flat, and there is no traditional HR or processes that come with working at larger organizations. There are three main departments. I run one, and my coworker who I am writing about, Maggie, runs one of the others. A small thing has become a big issue: While we all have open calendars to make scheduling easier, Maggie refuses to make her calendar open and keeps it entirely private. In addition, her calendar is often entirely booked with meetings, showing no open times to add anything. As a result, i…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. A reader writes: I am going to be leaving my company soon and starting my own business, and will need to hire support staff. One of the employees at my current company (Taylor) has told me she is looking for a new job. I find Taylor to be an excellent employee and I would be happy to have her working for me. I believe that she enjoys working with me as well. The catch is that Taylor primarily works with Leslie, one of my colleagues here, and has done so for several years. Leslie has been a mentor to me since I started working in this city. She is well liked and well connected in our field, while I’m …

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. Does using humor risk undermining me as a manager? Thank you so much for responding to my question! In truth, I didn’t even consider the possibility that using too many self-deprecating jokes would alter my employee’s perception of me, I was mainly focused on the quantity of my jokes. After I submitted my question, I thought over my interactions with them, and came to the conclusion that I was being way too silly, that my nervousness was manifesting as non-stop joke after joke, which had a strong possibility to detract from maintaining a professiona…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Offering a job to multiple people and giving it to the first one who accepts Decades ago, in the early 2000s, my friend was offered an assistant professor position at a university. She was told that the same job was being offered to several other candidates too, and that only the first person to accept the offer would be hired. Presumably as soon as one person accepted, the other offers would be withdrawn. I have never seen this practice anywhere else. This makes me curious: is this legal? (We are in the U.S.) What do you think of employers doing t…

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager. Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. How do I manage a “regular” job with a parallel career as a musician? I asked about career advice for musicians a long time ago, and I’ve waited a long time to have an update I felt like sending. Unfortunately, the last few years have just been really, really bad. Things started to go sideways not long after I wrote to you. The program I was in was a really bad fit for me, and I ended up dropping out long before the end of it. There were other bad things too – I won’t go into it all because it would be pretty identifiable. One major theme of the pa…