How women are fighting back against the resurgence of ‘bro culture’

[ResidentialBusiness]

In an interview with Joe Rogan last month, Meta founder Mark Zuckerberg made a plea for companies to embrace more “masculine energy.” Zuckerberg went on to say, “A culture that celebrates the aggression a bit more has its own merits.”

Never mind that Meta (then Facebook) became one of the world’s more profitable companies when COO Sheryl Sandberg ran its day-to-day operations. Or that Sandberg urged women to “lean in” by actively pursuing leadership roles and embracing opportunities in the workplace, sparking a global community dedicated to helping foster leadership, advancement and inclusion for women in the workplace.

“When a very powerful CEO who has platforms that nearly half of the world’s population use says something like that, regardless of what his intent and his definitions are and his meaning of it is, there’s a whole lens around individual bias and how it will be perceived,” says Samantha Katz, founder of business consultancy Actual Markets LLC in Manhattan.

Even before Zuckerberg’s comments about male energy, women say they were noticing a resurgence of masculinity in the workplace. Senior male leaders are no longer hiding that they find it objectionable that they can’t discuss certain topics or say certain jokes in the workplace, says Alma Derricks, founder and managing partner at REV, a business consulting firm in Los Angeles.

“Zuckerberg’s comment was an attempt to crush anything qualitative,” Derricks says. “To talk about mental health, wellness, and balance is seen as weak minded and it doesn’t have a place in the workplace.”

Here’s how women are pushing back against toxic male energy in the workplace.

Don’t alienate allies

Be careful not to alienate potential male allies by conflating “bro behavior” with truly toxic masochistic behavior, warns Eliza VanVanCort, author of A Women’s Guide to Claiming Space.

“When we say, ‘bros are doing this,’ we are taking out one section of the population who might actually be allies for us, and at this point, since our voices aren’t being heard, we need every ally possible,” VanCort says. Someone can be masculine and still believe in equity, justice and inclusivity, she says.

“I think the problem with calling it ‘bro culture’ is it sends a message to young men that being a bro means being an aggressor,” VanCort says. Instead of calling out the “bro culture,” she recommends calling out aggressive and dominating male behavior when you see it.

Ask ‘What do you mean?’

The easiest way to combat a microaggression is to ask, “What do you mean?” For example, when one of VanCort’s clients was recognized for the profits she brought to the company, her boss said in front of all her male colleagues, “We’re so proud of you. You made so much money last quarter, and I hope that you didn’t spend it all on a new purse.”

Rather than taking the bait and getting angry, the client simply said, “What do you mean?” Her boss stammered and said, “Well, you know, it’s funny. A new purse is funny.”

When she further responded with, “So, you think it’s funny that I would spend money on a new purse,” a male coworker stepped in and told the boss his remark wasn’t funny.

“When you point out a microaggression by asking a question, it’s more difficult to be accused of being sensitive or overreacting,” VanCort said.

Don’t be complicit

Women are often told to stand up for each other in meetings yet that can be difficult, especially if you and your colleague haven’t discussed a plan for supporting each other. Your response to toxic behavior during a meeting doesn’t have to be profound. Simply respond by saying, “Huh,” VanCort says.

Aggressors depend on everyone around them being complicit when they hear passive aggressive comments or witness microaggressions, VanCort says. “By saying, ‘huh,’ you are very subtly saying, ‘I am not going to follow you in this behavior.’”

Talk about your salary

“The best thing that you can do for other women at work is talk about how much money you make,” says Allison Venditti, CEO and founder of Moms at Work in Toronto, Canada. Many U.S. companies have a presence in Canada, Venditti says, so it’s evitable that Canadian women will encounter similar attitudes in the workplace.

Share information with female colleagues, especially younger female employees, about how to succeed in the workplace, how to get promoted and how to negotiate a higher salary, Venditti says.

Use your buying power

Women control 85% of household spending, according to TechCrunch.

“Women pick where we buy our cars, do the research for buying minivans, we buy all our kids’ clothes, we decide where we go on vacation,” Venditti says.

One of the easiest ways to push back on male energy is with your buying power, Venditti says. She is urging women to cancel their Amazon accounts after the company scaled back its diversity, equity and inclusion programs, and to stop shopping at Target after the company began phasing out its DEI programs. “If you’re not standing up for women, why would I shop at your store?”

View the full article