job application asked about age and caregiving, salad bar drama, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Job application asked about age and caregiving responsibilities

After hundreds of job applications in my career, this is a new one for me. I came across a required question on the application asking, “Do you have caregiving responsibilities such as childcare, eldercare, or disability care?” They added an asterisk stating, “We are building an organization that supports people in their many unique life situations. Knowing this information will make our hiring process, benefits, and professional development equitable and inclusive.”

I find this question intrusive and I don’t believe their stated reason for asking it. Am I better off clicking “prefer not to say” or lying and saying “no”? I do have childcare responsibilities, but I have a great combo of daycare + spouse + babysitters, and none of this interferes with my ability to be an accomplished executive. And, none of this is any of their business!

They have another required question: “How old are you?” with rather small age ranges (25-34, etc). I notice that the age range above “35-44” is suddenly much larger — “45-64″ and I’m pretty sure they’ll use this to disqualify anyone over the 35-44 age range. I find this question less bad than the childcare question, but I still don’t like it and want to answer “prefer not to say.” What do you think?

This is ridiculous! It’s not illegal in the U.S. to ask those questions in hiring, but it is illegal to consider the answers — so there is zero reason they should be asking.

If they want to ensure their benefits and professional development are equitable and inclusive, they can solicit feedback from their existing employees on those topics; there’s no reason it needs to be part of their hiring process. And if they want to ensure their process isn’t inadvertently screening out people with caregiving responsibilities or discriminating by age, there are better ways to do that (such as with surveys that are completely separate from the application, with clear info about how they’ll ensure the information isn’t correlated with your application, similar to the demographic surveys that the EEOC requires from large employers).

Moreover, even if they genuinely have the best of intentions, (a) they have no way to guard against unconscious bias once they know the information and (b) they are going to deeply unsettle many applicants who will take it exactly the way you did.

2. Can I get in trouble for being friends with an employee?

I’m a new manager and one of my newer employees and I get a long pretty well because we have a lot of common interests. They invited me out and I went but I keep wondering if I could get in trouble? I wanted to know if it would be a problem as they and a friend wanted to sort of meet up at a con in a few months as well.

You’re not likely to get in trouble for what’s already happened, but it is likely to turn into a problem if you keep doing it. The bigger problem, though, is that you’re just looking at this through the lens of “will I get in trouble?” when the bigger concern you need as a manager is, “Is this appropriate for my role / will it inhibit my effectiveness in my job?” — regardless of whether anyone above you ever raises it with you.

As a manager of a team, you need to keep professional distance between you and the people you manage. You can be warm and friendly, but you can be friends. You can go to the occasional team happy hour or dinner, but you can’t single out one person for friendship, because that will create the strong appearance of favoritism and special access to you, and other people on your team won’t trust that you’re managing fairly and impartially.

More here:
can a manager and employees be friends?

3. What should you do when you’re sick during work travel?

I know parents always give the worst work advice, so I, a parent, am turning to you to ask about something going on with my son, who is in his early 20s. He’s entry level in a notoriously tough job — think consulting or finance. Long hours, lots of pressure, lots of money, etc. He’s currently on a team that’s traveling each week to a client site for a few days, staying at a hotel.

This week he arrived at the client’s city with his team, and immediately fell ill with what sounds like the flu. He doesn’t need to go to a hospital, but he’s very under the weather. Now, he’s supposed to travel home tonight, but aside from feeling like utter crap, he probably shouldn’t be on a plane, even with a mask! (To make it even more fun, it would be two planes plus a layover.)

My take on it is that he should say to his supervisor “I’m too sick to travel” and then either stay in Client City for a couple more days until he feels better, or potentially even stay there for longer, until the team returns next week. I know my kid, and I know that he never wants to make a fuss or ask for special treatment, even when it’s deserved. And I know he’ll be wondering who would pay for his hotel in this case. But before I do that Mom Thing and give him my thoughts, I decided to ask you!

I’m with you. He should explain he’s too sick to travel, and he should assume that his company will cover the hotel since it’s an expense that arose from work travel. It would be astoundingly cheap for them not to, and I would be shocked if they declined to (particularly in this type of field, where they tend to throw money at people to make the travel-heavy lifestyle more bearable).

4. Cafeteria salad bar drama

The salad bar in our cafeteria has a stack of clear plastic shells to place the salad into. Three days ago, when I went for mine, the top shell on the stack had a long, blonde strand of hair on it that was clearly from one of the cafeteria workers. I quietly took the first three shells from the top of the stack and discreetly threw them away. Then I took a shell from the middle of the stack for my salad. The hair wasn’t touching the food, so I figured that was an easy solution.

I would’ve forgotten about it had I not later overheard a coworker tell another, “(MyName) used one of those clamshells that had a hair on it.” They both sounded grossed out, which is making me question my approach.

I figured the hair was just a one time mistake on part of the kitchen staff, so I didn’t want to make a spectacle about it. What would they have done? Thrown away and wasted the entire stack over one hair? What should I have done instead?

It doesn’t sound like they were saying you knowingly and intentionally chose a container with a hair on it, and that would be an extremely odd thing for anyone to conclude. Rather, it sounds like they were saying you didn’t know — i.e., that they were grossed out by the situation and feel bad that you may have had a hair in your food. I’m concluding this because they weren’t talking about you throwing the containers away, which you actually did; they were talking about you using one, which you didn’t.

Your office has a very, very low bar for what it considers interesting enough to gossip about!

5. When I’m remote, which state laws cover me?

I’m a transgender woman currently living in Tennessee, where there has been an onslaught of anti-transgender laws passed, with more being considered every week. There is an ominous feeling in the air living here, with reports of women like me being targeted for hate and violence. My family and I are moving to a blue state with strong protections written into law, where we feel like we can be safe to just exist.

I work remotely for a large multinational company that’s also based in Tennessee. I’m not out at work. I still work and present as my dead name and assigned gender at birth. The company I work for has backed away from LGBTQ support and, with the political leanings of the people I work with, I’m not comfortable coming out yet. But as my transition continues, there’s going to be a point where it’s going to be too apparent to deny.

I’m wondering where my legal protections lie, being a remote worker? Under the The President administration, I can’t rely on any federal protections. Even though the Bostock Supreme Court decision is still on record, the EEOC has completely stopped processing any cases. There are no Tennessee protections and there are currently bills in the state legislature trying to overturn Bostock and prevent any protections from ever being enacted.

Would I be protected by the laws of the state where I, as the employee, resides, or am I still only covered by the state laws where the company is headquartered?

You will be covered by the laws of the state where you work — so if you move to a state with stronger protections, those will apply.

Whether or not your company will follow those laws is a different question, as is what practical recourse you’d have if they don’t. But the laws of your new state are supposed to cover you.

The post job application asked about age and caregiving, salad bar drama, and more appeared first on Ask a Manager.

View the full article