Performance Tracking and Feedback

A reader writes: I work for a medium-sized, family-owned business. We all work from home. Some of us live in the same metro area but we’re not friends. We have an office culture of sensitivity and compassion when someone is going through a difficult time. For the last few months, every staff meeting somehow functions as an open mike for stories about horrific things that have befallen us, going back to the 1970s. I can’t give examples without needing a wall of trigger warnings. All are totally unrelated to the work we are there to discuss. We often end up with two or three people needing breaks to gather themselves, or being unable to pay attention when we do get to wor…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My manager has been freezing me out since I talked to HR about her Last May, I finished my masters and in September landed a job in my field and specialty. The first few months were great with my boss, Claire. She was super nice, let me know everything that was going on in the department, I got along with my other coworker in my department, and I finally felt like I had found my job and people. I even told Claire I had a disability that I put on my application. She was very understanding and supportive. Then in January, things changed. Claire accused me of trying to do her job anytime I suggested something and said I …

Last month we talked about times when you said the exact wrong thing at work, and here are 20 (!) of my favorite stories you shared. There are also many not included below but which you’ll be seeing in Mortification Week later this year. 1. The insult I once worked as an editor and I told an author that if they tried a certain method to make a certain change to their paper, it “might be worth a shit.” Shot. I meant shot. And I did not catch it before hitting send. 2. The inexplicable sneer I had a phone screening for a job many years ago. There was a particular way of doing a standard task that I used more as a freelancer than in my current job because my boss at my j…

A reader writes: My company has a habit of recruiting and hiring a replacement for fired employees before the person has actually been fired. The replacement doesn’t start work until after the original employee is gone, but the company is recruiting and interviewing before they’ve told the person they will be out of a job (and the person has no idea the company is actively interviewing for their spot). I suppose that this is … practical? But it feels so slimy! They’ve done this secret recruitment, not advertising the position in their normal ways so no one sees that it’s open and figures out what’s happening. It also prevents anyone internally from applying for these po…

A reader writes: I work at a feminist tech company. Our app is focused on sex and intimacy. We’re a very small team, primarily remote, but every month we have an in-person get-together and workshop. The issue is with the CEO of the company, who also oversees all the engineers. I’m not an engineer and I don’t report to him, but I am in a director role and the nature of my job does mean that I have to talk to him a lot. For the most part, I respect this man professionally. I think he leads the engineers well, and he takes my advice seriously when it’s about something I’m clearly the expert in. However, he’s a chronic over-sharer, discusses things that make me uncomfortabl…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworkers’ approach to group work is driving me mad At my workplace, we’re regularly required to give short presentations on how our work is coming along. As we work in teams, the teams need to present together. It seems like every time I come up against the same dynamic, and it’s driving me up a tree: For example, Fergus and I need to do a 5-10 minute presentation on sales in a certain district. We have to make a PowerPoint and a summarizing document to be shared with everyone. We split up the work so that we’re each handling one half of both the PowerPoint and the document, and set up a check-in meeting a few day…

A reader writes: There have a been a few questions recently that are along the lines of “How do I explain that (insert reason here) is why I want to leave my job?” I am curious what interviewers are getting out of asking this question. People leave for a multitude of reasons or no reason at all, and are going to put the best spin possible on the answer if they are asked. How does what someone states as their reason for leaving translate to helpful information for hiring? Because sometimes the answer gives really helpful information. Not always, but enough of the time to make it worth inquiring. For example, if a candidate says they’re leaving their job because it invo…

A reader writes: I need help in assessing the pros and cons of going to work for someone with no experience managing employees. I have over 10 years of experience leading teams or managing programs in IT and am looking at senior mid-level roles. I’m currently in the process of interviewing for a role that seems very promising and checks off almost all my boxes. Yet in the process of learning about the hiring manager, I discovered that this person is a recent graduate (less than five years ago) who was rapidly promoted into a role that now sees them managing people. I would be the first person they hire and manage. This is concerning to me, as I’m afraid that someone wi…

A reader writes: For the last five years, I’ve worked at a nonprofit with around 80 employees. Up until about six months ago, I was full-time and the two primary roles I had during that time were in middle management. Now I’m part-time (10 hours/week), not in any management/leadership position, and in a different department. Our organization serves victims of power-based interpersonal violence, so there are several practices/policies in place to try to maintain client and staff safety. One is that our building is at a confidential location and staff have fobs to get in. It’s common to hold the door for a coworker to get inside or let a coworker in if they forgot their f…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. How do I change a company’s culture as the owner’s son? My father owns a production company with roughly 200 employees, multiple factories, and a strong international client base. We are based in a country with limited workers’ rights, but are trying to adopt American labor standards to attract higher-profile clients. I work here part-time with largely undefined responsibilities, but usually end up handling emails, editing product photos, interviewing potential interns, and arranging internal events. My position alone raises red flags, as I make more than my work would merit any other employee. My father has asked for…

Remember the letter last month from the person asking how their office could hire people who wouldn’t be uncomfortable with their culture and quickly leave? Among other things, they mentioned a cardboard cut-out coworker (Robert), a celebrity death betting pool where winners would get an extra day off, and a lunchtime discussion of whether aliens can have orgasms. The letter-writer provided more info after response, and agreed I could share it and respond here: Thank you for responding to my letter. After reading the response and comments, I realized that the alien orgasm example drew more attention than I expected, even though I had meant it as one particularly bad exam…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My boss isn’t doing her job and things are falling apart I work for an accounting firm where I am the only full-time employee to my boss, Katie. She inherited the business from her father and is within a few years of retiring. I am looking to leave this job this year but until I am able to, I am having trouble dealing with a lot of issues she is having. We are in the middle of tax season and she is falling so far behind on processing tax returns. Many clients have called to ask the status of their return, and I have had to stretch the truth of their status so they do not get upset at me. I always inform my boss when t…

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. Here are the rules for the weekend posts. Book recommendation of the week: Whidbey, by T Kira Madden. Three women connected to one man navigate the aftermath of sexual assault. (Amazon, Bookshop) * I earn a commission if you use those links. The post weekend open thread – April 4-5, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on any work-related questions that you want to talk about (that includes school). If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to take your questions to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please do not repost it here, as it may be in my queue to answer. The post open thread – April 3, 2026 appeared first on Ask a Manager. View the full article

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go… 1. Should my boss message me before calling on Teams? My boss recently called me very early in the morning (7:50 am) through Teams without notice. I was working already; I got online at 7 (my work hours are 7 am – 4 pm) but it bothered me and got me a little anxious. I let it go as a missed call and wrote to her immediately after saying that I was ready now. Was that okay or is it okay for her to call without messaging me first to ask if I’m available? Or just because she’s the boss is accepted? The fact that was so early caught me by surprise, because she’s usually online later, but I think it would have bothered me reg…

A reader writes: I’m a relatively new manager, and I’m still finding my footing when it comes to shifting from being an individual contributor to overseeing a team. One thing I struggle with is knowing when it’s appropriate to delegate tasks to my team versus doing them myself. I manage a communications team of four at a university. When my manager assigns me work — things like drafting communications on a specific topic or reviewing copy from another department — I’m never sure whether she expects me to do it personally or for me to assign it to someone on my team. I feel like she is expecting me to delegate them: these tasks fall squarely within my team’s remit, and I…

Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. My boss made me verify that I’m really exercising (first update) A happy update. Today we had our spring quarterly all-staff meeting, where HR announced the return of the flex-time exercise program. Two changes were made to the program: 1. Structure around verification requests, include who may request verification and why. (Only your direct manager may initiate the request, which must be routed through human resources.) 2. A “exercise program log” is now the only document that we must produce for a verification request. This is a spreadsheet provided by HR that we can complete electronically or by hand, and simply i…

It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. A reader writes: I am looking for advice on managing ADHD at work, but the caveat is that I’m still nursing a baby, so most medication is off the table and when I do stop (hopefully soon – he’s over a year old and I’m actively working on weaning), I know it may take me months to find something that works. So I am really looking for non-medication strategies in the meantime. I recently got diagnosed with ADHD (in my late thirties) after having my second child and going off the executive functioning cliff deep end (thanks, hormones!). I’ve always had symptoms and have nearly always managed okay enough, but after coming back to…

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My coworker was upset that she wasn’t told to go home early after getting bad news I have a coworker who recently found out she’d likely have to put her dog to sleep. She was crying at work, understandably so, and it was quite upsetting to see. I went through something similar about three years ago and losing a pet is devastating. For the rest of the day after finding out, she was berating management for not offering her the opportunity to go home early. The thing is, it’s common knowledge at my job that if you need, or even just want, to go home early, management always says yes. All she had to do was ask but, but sh…

A reader writes: I own a small (but growing) tax service. Recently I hired Cara, who moved to the area and was able to step right in, and during our busy season to boot. Much of the year, we work 4-10 hour days with Fridays off. During tax season, we are busier and work 5-10 hour days. On Fridays, I buy the staff lunch. Because of dietary restrictions, allergies, etc., I let them order from whatever place they want, within reason on price, and pay for delivery or they turn in their receipt if they leave the building. Cara does not eat lunch, maybe a can of Diet Coke but nothing else. I have asked multiple times if she would like to order and stressed that it is okay, t…

A reader writes: I am a high-performing, respected, well-liked senior contributor on a 25-person team at a global tech company. Since Covid, we have all been successfully working remotely. Recently, the company has enacted a “hybrid work” policy, which for me means I am supposed to go to the office three times a week. Because our team and those we work closely with are scattered around the globe, this means we are often going to the office to sit on virtual calls. Our team also has 12 contract workers who are not required to be in the office due to the terms of their contracts and desk availability. Additionally, the director of our team, Scott, is considered a teleworke…

A reader writes: The company I currently work for was perfect for me when I started in the corporate world — low-key, the owner is very hands-off, and my bosses let me work without micromanaging. But recently we’ve become a lot bigger while still keeping that “small business” mindset. Our profit has more than quadrupled in the past seven years, but the number of employees in headquarters has not increased in response (we’re still fewer than 20 people). A daily catch phrase is, “It’ll slow down eventually … right?” It’s wearing me down to a point where I need to find another job, and I have started to activity job search. My concern is, I honestly do the job of three pe…

A reader writes: A few years ago, I appeared in a series of videos about “how I got my job.” My job is pretty niche and there really isn’t a ton of institutional information about it yet, so it got a lot of attention. Since then, I’ve consistently gotten two to three LinkedIn messages per week from people looking to break into my field. About 20% are just saying that they found the videos inspiring (which I love to hear!), 30% are just asking to connect, and the remainder are asking for more career advice — but in a very general way. Think “I’d love to get your thoughts on how to break into the industry/get hired at your company.” I’m of two minds: I really want to hel…

Recently we heard from people who work at events — their horror stories and wins — and here are 10 of my favorite stories they shared. 1. The applause I was part of a round of lightning talks. The event organizers told us we had five minutes apiece, and for enforcement they told the audience to applaud violators off the stage. I was done in 90-odd seconds because I’m cool like that. “Blowhard Bob” the CISO, however, adored the sound of his own voice and did not believe time limits applied to him. He was barely halfway through his slides when the applause started. He tried to talk over it, being Blowhard Bob, but the audience only raised the volume of clapping until he…

A reader writes: I oversee a medium-sized department who are all required to be on-site, although we were remote for quite a while following the pandemic. My staff is pushing very hard for hybrid working, and while I am open to it, I have concerns. In the past, when that the majority of our team worked from home, some of the staff really excelled at it, while others were frankly awful. Literally, the staff who were excellent outperformed the worst by a factor of ten to one. Unfortunately, the lower performers didn’t always recognize that they were not being productive. The culture in my organization is very much one of equity, and I am trying to balance that with the k…